And The Tears Fall

December 17, 2009
September 13th, the day I found out I was pregnant. I remember it clearly; the doctor’s office was empty that morning. The nurse called my name off the list, took my weight, and symptoms. She nodded as I said nausea, simply blinked when I said nothing food related looked, sounded, or tasted good. Then her eyes widened when I said ‘Morning Sickness’.

“I’ll be right back.” she replied. This had been going on for a little over three weeks. I was beginning to worry, since I never get sick. I didn’t get chicken pox, even though four of my siblings had it. I never missed a day of school. Even when my roommate in college got Swine Flu, I didn’t get sick. So this was very unusual, especially for me. When the nurse came back, she had a urine test cup in hand.

“Why?” I asked. She probably thought I was a simpleton for only using one word, that’s all that came to mind when I saw it though. She cleared her throat, putting the clipboard on her lap.

“We are going to test you to see if you’re pregnant.” Shocked, I began to blubber.

“But, don’t you think I would know something like that? I can’t even believe this right now, you’re joking right? Am I being Punked? There’s no way I’m pregnant!” The nurse shook her head, handed me the test tube. I stared at the floor in disbelief. Then slowly rose from the cot and went to the bathroom, there was only one way to settle the issue.
I had to wait only a few minutes, the nurse returned with a sheet of paper in her hand.
“You tested positive, congratulations Mrs. Ticona.” The nurse smiled. She proceeded to tell me, after the doctor examined me, that I was about three weeks pregnant, not very long at all. I have to admit; at first I wasn’t that happy. And then as I exit the doctor’s office, I was grinning ear-to-ear. I guess it wasn’t that bad, I wanted to get home to tell my husband as soon as possible. I had no idea what his reaction was going to be, and I was nervous, yet excited to find out. When I arrived at home I searched the house for him, but discovered he wasn’t home yet from work. I immediately picked up the phone and dialed my mother.
“Hullo?” Her melodious voice said into the receiver.
“Mom? I have great news! I mean at first I didn’t think it was all that great but now, I’m so excited!” I rambled.
“Calm down Anita! Just tell me whatever it is that is on your mind!”
“Mom…I’m pregnant!” I said into the receiver. “Mom? Are you still there?” I heard a faint -thud- and then footsteps.
“Uh, hello? Yea…mom just fainted…what did you say to her?” My brother Nathan asked in a hushed tone.
“I just got back from the doctor’s office, I’m pregnant.” I smiled to myself.
“You? Pregnant? Holy crap! Congratulations mommy!” He chuckled.
“Hmm thanks… at least I think.” I muttered. I decided maybe ‘mommy’ didn’t sound as bad as I thought it was going to, it’ll be different when it comes from my child’s own lips though.
“Hold on a moment, will you?” He asked. “Mom, wake up. Anita is pregnant; you can’t change that now, now can you?” He asked her. I heard her sigh and clear her throat.
“I guess not. Lemme have the phone back now dear, yes, thank you Nathan.” She said softly.
“Well, this is not what I was expecting; I mean a promotion, a new dog perhaps, but not a baby!” She exclaimed. My heart fell.
“Do you mean that- that, you’re not happy for me?” I began to tear up. She stuttered for a moment.
“No- no Anita, I just wasn’t expecting this to happen so- so uh soon.” I could see her clearly in my mind, rubbing her temple in frustration as to what to say next.
“Mom, Robert and I have been together for almost six years, married for three.” I could feel the anger in me building. “It was bound to happen. And now that I’ve thought about it, I think were ready to be parents. We are lucky enough to have a house, insurance; we both have jobs, and a high enough income to support a baby! And well mom, I think this is the best thing that has happened to me since I got married and since dad’s death!” I started to sob into the phone. Uncontrollable tears. She was silent for a moment.
“Oh honey, please don’t cry. I’m sorry, so sorry, I didn’t mean that. Oh Anita…”
“I have to go now mom, I love you.” I sniffled.
“Alright, I love you too dear. Bye.” I never say bye when I hang up the phone, because I think ‘bye’ means you won’t see them again and I don’t ever want that to be the case. Softly I pushed the end button and lay down on the couch. It seemed like only a few minutes had went by when I felt the gentle touch of someone shaking my shoulder.

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