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Do I Belong Here??
A new day. A new school year. A new school. A new city. A new state. A new country! Friends = 0
"What am I doing here??" I thought as I made my way down the hall trying to fing my locker.I had thought that people in NYC were friendly, obviously I had not been to high school. Already I had been laughed at by the most populer girl in the school and her followeres.
I was populer.NOT
Thats when I saw him. If I would have known he was here, I would have never agreed to move. After all he was the first guy I had loved,kised and plegded my heart to getting only pain and my heart broken by him in return. He had moved on.I hadnt
Emotions buried deep inside me rushed to the surface and for one crazy moment i thought he was here for me but then sanity caught up with me and i dissapeared into the crowd hoping he had not seen me.I didnt see him for the rest of day,he wasnt in any of my classes but my thoughts were ocupied by him.
I had thought if I ever saw him again i would hate him but instead seeing him made me realize once again how much i missed him. How much I missed when he called me just to say goodnight. the way he said I love you when we kept the phone..rushed but sure and full of love. The way his one smile melted my anger and how we talked for hours about nothing at all.How the first thing I did in school was to look for him and wave when i finally spotted him.
Now, things were very different.
Being a coward, I avoided anything that could bring us face to face. I never came in front of him, hiding behind people,books and even the dumpster to avoid being spotted. But one part of me wished that he would see me and magically everything would be fine but it never happened.
Then came the night of the winter formal. It was my first dance and I didnt have a date but I didnt care and went anyway. I wore a beautiful black dress with a fitted bodice which flared a little to fall just above my knees. my black locks were open, waving gently down till they came to a rest along my waist. Kohl ringed my dark brown eyes making them stand out.
When I made my way towards the refreshment table I bumped into someone.I lifeted my head to apologize but the words died on my lips when i found myself staring into the deep black eyes which I had trusted so much and which had contained so much love for me.We had made eye-contact after 2 years but not knowing if he recogonized me i quickly turned to leave.He caught my hand and i turned slowly.
"You think I didnt see you on the first day or every day?? I saw you everytime even thought you tried to hide behind things.I wanted to talk to you so much but you dissapeared whenever i tried to come near you.Tell me,do you hate me that much??" he asked me.
I was stunned but I managed to say "I could never hate you,even if a tried."
The words he said next took my breath away.."I am sorry! I love and I have always loved you but a stupid mistake made me lose you.I didnt realize what we had until it was gone.When I didnt see you the first thing in the morning smiling at me or hear your voice just before I went to sleep, I realized I missed you.I missed how you ran your hands through my hair whenever we kissed,how you would pass me notes during the class or how you blushed when I said I love you.I missed how you would become sad whenever i was scolded,how you called me as soon as you got home.I missed the way you forgave me everytime and how you stood by me when i needed you.Can u still forgive me??" he said as he held out his hand.
Wordlessly I slipped my hand into his' and rested my head on his shoulder.We started swaying to the music and I melted in his embrace like I belonged there because you know what?? I did!