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"No, it couldn't happen like this. This couldn't be happening. There was no way in hell. It just wasn't possible. But unfortunately for Sam Mason it was. Sam Mason had fallen for a girl. Normally not an unusual occurrence but for a gay guy it was.
Some might assume that maybe Sam was bi but he wasn't. He had never in his almost 18 years of life so much as looked at a girl let alone been attracted to one. But there he was in love with a girl. There was just something about Sarah that drew him in. Maybe it was her understanding smile, or her gorgeous deep brown eyes or her beautiful pale skin. Or maybe it wasn't any of that. Maybe it was just that Sam was attracted her personality. Something hard to fathom but true. Sam Mason was attracted Sarah just for her personality.
But he couldn't act on this attraction. People would look down on him. His friends would call him a traitor. They would not associate with him because he sold out. People would assume he was bi or he was lying. He would be accepted by the very people he hated. That's not what he wanted. He wanted to not be in love with a girl. He wanted Sarah to be a guy. Or him to be a girl. He wanted to just be accepted. He wanted to not become a different type of outcast.
Sam would never admit but he did mind being an outcast. He always just wanted to fit in but he wasn't going to sell out to fit in. That's why from the very beginning he didn't lie about who he was. He came out in 3rd grade when he was merely 9. First person in his school not counting Griffin who was arguably the most flamboyant boy Sam had ever met, to come out. He was a role model for all the other gays to come out. They look up to him. That's why he couldn't be in love with a girl but he was.
Then there was his fear of being judged. He was already constantly being judge but at least he could control what they were judging him on. He had friends to back him up. Just being in love with a girl would cause a different kind of judgment; one Sam couldn't handle. He would receive judgment from both sides of the fences and he couldn't handle that. Not now. He was about to graduate high school and wanted to end it with no trouble. The last 3 1/2 years had sucked for Sam and he didn't want the 5 months to suck also.
On the other hand, if Sam didn't go after her he would be staying true to himself and that would be even worse than being judged.
"Max, what do you think I should do?" Sam asked his best friend desperately searing for answers. Unfortunately for Sam this was one time that Max didn't have an answer.
"I don't know, man. I still can't over the fact that you like a girl."
"I don't just like her, I love her."
"Then stop talking to me and go after to her." Max told Sam the exact words that Sam needed to hear. And with that the blond rushed to go talk to the love his life. Sam no longer had a doubt in his mind about being with Sarah.
Sam spotted Sarah's beautiful Long black hair from across the street. The tan boy raced going faster than his short legs could take him. He had to talk to Sarah.
"Sarah!" Yelled the brown eyed boy. Sarah turned around to see the boy ho had broken her heart and after staring at Sam for a brief second continued to walk. " Sarah!" Sam yelled again after the beautiful tall brunette. And again Sarah kept on walking.
Sam began to run. Something strange to the boy considering that he hated exercise. Sam ran faster trying to catch up to Sarah who at this point was walking extremely fast.
"Sarah, please talk to me." Sam said as he placed a delicate hand on Sarah's shoulder.
"What do you want?" Sarah said trying to kept herself from crying.
"I want to tell you that I love you."
"You expect me to just accept that. You hurt me, you hurt me bad."
"And I'm sorry. I had a lot of stuff to figure out."
"And you expected me to wait for you to figure it all out."
"I don't know." Sam really didn't know. He didn't know what he expected. He didn't think, he just acted.
"What do you know?"
"I know that I love you."
"And I love you but I can't trust you."
"So we'll never be together?"
"Maybe one day but not today. Not until I can trust you not to break my heart again." And with that Sam and Sarah parted separate ways.