The gate opens. I look up and see a couple staring at me. The women looked like she just won the lottery. “This one!” The lady picks me up with a comforting look. What was going on? All the others were very loud and obnoxious. “Aww it's okay honey, you have a home now.” “Everything will be alright now don't worry.” When walking, I can feel her heartbeat beating the speed of light. The thoughts of abandonment circle in my head, for this, is the only time I can recollect being outside, what I thought was my home. Soon, she lets go of me, I can barely stand. I kept trying to stay still but some force was moving me around like a pinball. I could see outside, we were moving very fast. Where are we going? I can see the lady and her husband in front of me. She looks back at me and says “I'm so happy, what should we name him?” A quiet “I don’t care” and “we should have gotten the other one” was quickly followed by the man. She didn't respond.
We stopped moving. Once again, the arms of the woman were forthcoming and accepting of me. She picks me up. “We are finally home sweetie!” She opens the door and puts me down with a gentle touch. “Do you want a treat?” I was confused. What was a treat? Regardless, I decided to check the place out. I ran as fast as I could, looking around and scanning the area. This was my home now. I was still really confused. The woman soon came over to me and again comforted me. “I'm going to name you Otto.” From then I could only show excitement and thankfulness to her by licking her face when she picked me up. “Aww I’m so happy, you're adorable” I soon realized that running around the house made me very tired and decided to shut my eyes. With the help of a relaxing head scratch, I fall asleep.
I wake to find myself in a cage. Unlike the other cage, this one was very comfortable and even had a little toy for me. I still had a ton of energy however and wanted to roam around the house more. I decided to screech and point. Silence. Nobody was home. The thoughts of abandonment begin to circle in my head again. The loneliness and sadness were just reimbursed and I found myself in a very sad mood. With all the unknowns in life and what has happened to me so far, I couldn't hold my emotions in. I dreamt of the one time of being happy with the woman who was forthcoming and welcoming. I didn't know where she went nor how I ended up in this crate. All I knew was I wanted to see her again. “Bam”, the front door opens forcefully. It was the women again, however, not the women I remember. She looked pissed and was yelling at her husband who appeared to have a drink in his hand. “You are too busy paying attention to your alcohol than you are to me.” He slaps her and in the process drops his drink. “Look what you made me do women!” I’m scared and put my face into my blanket. “Get out of this house! NOW!” With his anger and frustration, he punches a hole in the wall, kicks open the door and leaves. The emotions from her begin to pour out like a waterfall. I could finally understand something; her pain and sadness from her husband. Turning toward me I could see a spark of relief in her eyes as she sprints toward me. She opens the gate and holds me like it's her most prized possession. The tears dripped onto my ears in where every tear felt like a different problem being released. I felt as if she needed me as much as I needed her.
Since then, life has slowly improved. The bond between my owner and I has grown strong. She told me everything about what was going on in her life and expressed her emotions to me when she felt the need to. She finally got the job she always wanted at a new research firm. The only bad part about that is I only got to see her early in the morning and late at night. She said the job is tough, but she loves it. I was happy for her. For me, I spend most of the days napping and playing with my toys. On the weekends, she would always take me to the park and play ball with me. Sometimes we would even walk to the store where she would get me treats. She meant the world to me. One day when I was waiting for her to come home by the front door at the normal time (just after dark.) I was surprised to see no entry. Maybe she was going to pick up food or run some errands? As time kept ticking it soon got very late, still no sight of her. I stayed up all night lying down in the hope she would return. Still nothing; I was incredibly tired and filled with sadness and confusion. It overwhelmed me to the point where all the pointing and crying put me to sleep.
It has been a couple days since her return. I can feel the anxiety coming over my head like a very dark cloud. Luckily, I was able to rummage my way through the garbage to find scraps that I would eat. That reminded me of the times I was on the street, lonely, hungry and had nowhere to go. On the streets, I felt betrayed… but by who? Having no recollection of who I was and what I was doing I ran for days. Days felt like years and those years wasted running from something I had no recollection of. A light of hope soon arrived however when I was meet by two strangers. One had a net and the other was luring me in like as if he would take care of me. All the running and confusion soon gave up and I lied there as if I was dead. They took me. Like her, the man carried me with a tight cradle except for this time I couldn't feel his heart, only his bulky uniform. To this day I can't say if this man was a hero or just another struggle I faced. I know that living in a crate next to many others just like me was better than on the streets, but wasn't amazing. Again I was trapped, except this time in a more physical way in where the small portions of untasteful food and water were behind bars. I was happy that somebody was taking care of me, however, lying in the crate could only hold me to think about the terrible times on the street. Just like how the only thing I can think about right now is the recollection of my horrific past.
“Screech” I hear the door open. I sprint around the corner expecting her to be there. It wasn't her. Instead of him. This was the first time I have seen him since the incident which left her and me on an emotional island. He looks at me, wanting forgiveness with tears in his eyes. I knew in my heart that I could never forgive him but part of me felt like the only person that could upset him was her. “Come here Otto, please” he begged with open arms. I was hesitant, I tried to run but the agony and confusion again came over my head and locked my legs to the point I couldn't move. Approaching me, I begin to point but was also filled with anger at the same time. I bite him, letting my emotions get the best of me. He screams and lunges at me so quick I had no time to react. The way he carried me felt like I was just some trash that he was about to take out. I fought my hardest to escape but he wouldn't let go. Again I find myself in the same place that I was in right after she adopted me, I could see outside but still had no grasp on the force that was pushing me side to side. We were moving very fast, faster than all the walks that she gave me. I look up at the front and this time I only see the man, she wasn't there. Once again, where were we going?
We stopped. Once again the man's arms reach towards me, I bite his hand but he is persistent and takes me again. This time I give up. When walking, his tight grasp gave me barely enough room to breath. I close my eyes not wanting to relive another horrific moment. “Room 278” I bring back my attention only to see another lady in an all-white uniform. I look around and once again I see the others glaring at me. Their eyes looked just liked her when she first saw me, what was happening? As we approach a room I can see another lady in a white uniform and bed with someone on it. It was her. With all my might I escape his grasp for how nothing could hold us apart from our bond. I jump up to her bed and lick her face just like how I always would when she got home. She didn't move. I licked it again thinking maybe she didn't notice. Again nothing. I was confused. I dig my face into her chest just like the first day she got me. I could once again feel her heartbeat, this time it was very slow. Something was wrong. I look back at the lady in white, she is crying “Is it time?” With the same emotion, he replies “yes.” The lights on the bed turn off and the screen goes black. With my head still in her chest, I try to listen to hear her heartbeat. Nothing. I lick her face. Nothing. She was gone. I try to close my eyes and recollect all the good times I had with her. I couldn't. All I can think about was why? And how? I wish my heart would tell me to stay with her and comfort her even though she was gone. However, I couldn't do that either. All of my actions and emotions have to lead me down dead ends and cliffs. I had nothing left. I licked her face again with my emotions taking over my actions. My emotions lead me to bolt for the door. I knew I had to run away from all this mess and try my best to start over. “Otto come back buddy!” I couldn't forgive him, my heart is too broken to fix. I kept running past all the people in white aprons and saw an opportunity for the front door. I squeeze past the man at the door just making it outside. I was in the clear. I guess this was it. This is my life. This is the rough life of a stranded dog.