Lost Love | Teen Ink

Lost Love

February 2, 2018
By Anonymous

I gasped, standing up. There is no way! Jumping up and down, Liam stands and smiles at me; his beautiful god blessed smile. “Oh my god! Thank you so much! I love you, I love you, I love you!” I screeched. I can’t believe we are going to Manchester, England!


Liam laughed, and embraced me in a hug. “I know, baby!  We are gonna rent out a house, and we are going to have the amazing life that we deserve. There will be no more crying, as long as we are there. I promise.” His sweet voice muffled, from the neck of my sweater, that was currently snuggling him.


Looking up at him, “When, Lili?” I asked. He smiled.


“Tomorrow?” He said questionly,
I jumped up and down. “I have to go pack! How long are we staying? Are you already packed? Who’d you tell?” I asked him.


He laughed, “Silv, calm down. About 2 months, Yes, and I told your parents, as well as mine.” He hugged me one more time. “Go pack Silv.” He smiled made a ‘Shoo’ motion. Screeching once more, I ventured my way to my room, maybe tripping over a few things on the way... 

 

**********
  Feeling my stomach drop, I sat up straight, and looked out the window. Shaking Liam, “We’re here!” I smile . Looking ahead, I notice a passenger giving me a death stare. I shrink into my seat. Chuckling, Liam sends a nod his way. The passenger turns around, and the plane dips again, causing me to gasp and hold my stomach.
Liam reaches over me and slides the shade up. My eyes blur from the change, and slowly adjust to the beautiful, breathtaking Manchester. I stared out the window in awe.


Manchester was beautiful. I closed the shade as tears dripped down my cheeks. Happy tears. Liam looked at me in puzzlement, “Silv, are you okay?” He embraced me in a hug.


I laughed and pulled away from the hug and wiped my tears. “I’m just so happy.” Liam chuckled.


“Me too, baby. Me too.”

 

**********
I gawked, staring out the window, watching beautiful Manchester pass by, road by road. It feels so weird, sitting in the “passenger” seat, but it being the opposite. It feels like i’m breaking many, many laws. I feel constantly on edge, feeling as if we were on the wrong side of the road. I turned to Liam focusing on the road, he was still amazingly beautiful, hands at 8 and 4 o'clock, hands clenched tightly on the wheel. He’s only drove here once, but I trust him completely. Liam reached to the volume button on the radio, and silenced it. Running his hand through his beautiful brown hair, he sighed. “We are going to stay at Radisson Hotel for a while until we find a house.”


“Its okay babe. I love being here, and as long as I’m with you, I’m perfectly amazing.” He smiled at me. Gasping, I turned to him. “Do they have a pool?”


He laughed. “Yes they do, Silv.” I clapped my hands and turned back to the window.


“You really love that window, huh?” He made a sad face. “More than me?”


I turned to him. “Yes. I do love this window. But never more than you. I looooooove you.” I dragged the ‘O’ out. He smiled his beautiful smile.  “I loooooove you too, Silv.” He lifted a hand off the wheel and pointed ahead.


I looked to where he was pointing. There it was in all its beauty, Radisson Hotel. I started, speechless. It was beautiful, breathtaking maybe.


Turning to him, I frowned.  “You got a 5 star hotel? No way. Baby you didn’t need to get a 5 star.” Of course I loved it, but he shouldn’t have wasted his money.


“Silv it’s okay. Everything’s worth it when I'm with you. I promise.” He looked at me and sighed. “Baby, I promise.” He pulled into a car spot and turned to me. He looked into my eyes, searching. I looked away.

“Are you sure?”


“I’m sure, Silv.”


“Okay, but don’t spend so much money on me. We need to save just in case, okay?”


“Baby, I’m going to spend my money on you, though. I love you, and that’s just one way of showing my appreciation.


“But I can’t do the same thing, so please, do it sparingly.”


Liam sighs, “Okay. Did you take your medicine on the plane after you woke up?” I look away. I didn’t.


“No, but-”


“Baby you have to. I’m sorry but it's not a ‘but’ situation.” He unlocks the doors. “Lets go sign in and then you can take your medicine.” He smiles at me, and I nod, and get out of the car, and round to meet Liam on the other side.


Liam grabs my hand, and we begin to walk to the doors. I walk next to him, other than my shaking breath, there is silence. “Watch your step,” He comments as we approach a sidewalk. I step up and Liam stops walking, forcing me to stop too. He turns to me. He searches my eyes.


Liam opens his arms, and I embrace myself tightly in a hug, his warm, comforting hug. My ragged breathing calms down, Liam’s hugs always calm me. Softly letting go, Liam kisses my forehead. “Don’t worry, baby. People will come get our bags out of the car when we get in.” He smiles, “at least I don’t have to do it again.” I laugh, remembering when Liam first met my parents. His constant stuttering was so cute, may I add. He ended up tripping over the coffee table and completely embarrassing himself, my parents now love him. Almost as much as I.  It was a sorta ‘You had to be there’ thing, but it was hilarious.


“That's right.” I laughed and started walking again, swinging our hands between us. He opened  the door for me, and we walk into this amazing hotel, smiling.


**********
About a month has gone by, Liam and Silver are great. But Liam has recently became annoyed with Silvers presence quite often.

I jumped and backed away from the booming voice that was talking to me. This Liam is scary. I want to leave. I felt the tears drip down my cheeks, and Liam scoffed. “Silver. Stop. I’m not going to hurt you, okay? I love you, but that doesn't mean that I can’t going to be mad at you.” His voice yelled.


I backed up more, “Why are you mad at me?” I spoke softly.


“Because your annoying me! I’m trying to work on this because if I don't, you want to know what will happen?” I flinched. “You will leave this house and go back to that hotel until I can get it done. Without this paperwork this time in Manchester is over, I don’t have a problem with that, do you?” He didn’t wait for my answer. “ Just. Leave. Me. Alone.” I shook with sobs.


   Turning to the door, I stuttered through my sobs,  “I’m sorry.” Slowly opening the door, I close my eyes, and step out.


Setting my forehead against the door, I shut my eyes. With hesitation, I turned. I ran for a safety that I hoped to find, and a safety that may not be reality, I ran.


**********
Turning around, I searched, seeking the steps I took to follow back home. The dark skies, are making me feel tired, and beaten down made me crave my warm home. Slowly walking the streets of the dark Manchester night, the occasional breeze of the passing cars, I sought my way home.

Letting out a shaky breath, the door squeaks as I slowly close it behind me.  Spotting Liam on the couch, I continue to the Loft, where the extra bed lays. I snuggle into the soft blankets, and fall silently asleep.

**********

I walk out of my bathroom, ready for the day into the kitchen. Liam is on the couch and he turns. “Are you making breakfast?” I roll my eyes.


“No, Liam. Im making it for me and i’m going to leave you alone because that's seemingly all you want me to do. So make your own breakfast.” I say getting out a bowl, and lift my eyes to his.


“Take your medicine.” He whispers to me, his eyes searching mine.


“Excuse me?” I ask in disbelief.


“You need to take your medicine.” He says a little louder, but still at a whisper level.


I slam my bowl down on the counter. “You think this is because I haven’t took my medicine, Liam? Is that all you really think of me? That I am not myself without my medicine? Take your own medicine.” I yell at him argerly.


“No, but-” He starts.


“I’m leaving. Bye, Liam.” I walk out the door, and down the road.
  

**********

Life has been, I mean, what can I say? It’s life without my happiness. I honestly don’t know what happened.

One day we were fine, we really were. But the next Liam started acting really, like, off. I guess I did something.. I don’t know what yet. It’s been about a week of him treating me like dirt. I still love him, but he may not still love me. I’ve been off my meds for about 3 days. I like it better without them. With them I feel sleepy, and I don’t feel like myself. Anyways, as of right now, i’m at the local picnic grove. It’s cold outside. Maybe 56 degrees fahrenheit? It’s getting close to winter. I really think that this is sorta my home. I haven’t spent a day in the house ever sense Liam started yelling at me alot. I miss him…

Someone taps my back; taking my focus off my journal. I slam the journal cover shut and turn around. I lift my eyes and meet them with… Liam?

“Liam? What are you doing here? You can’t be here. This is my spot you have the house and you should get what you want because I ruined something for you and I don’t know what it is so I get this grove and you get the house with maybe-” I take a deep breath and hide my shaking hands as Liam puts his hand out signaling for me to stop my useless rant, as I’d imagine.


He stares at me in shock, “Silv? What in the world are you doing out here? You are going to freeze. Look at you, you’ve only got a thin sweater on.” I look down my outfit and shrug in shame, “Silver, let's go.” Liam grabs my arm and pulls me up from the bench.


I shake my arm out of his grip and scoff, “ You think you can control me? Just because it's cold doesn't mean you are suddenly the boss of me. Liam you've been horrible to me. You are so lucky I haven't been horrible to you, and it won't happen, because i'm not a lowlife that yells at his girlfriend.”


Liam gawks at me, “You think that just because I was rude to you that it means that i’m a lowlife? Silver, I came here to apologize. Don’t yell at me.”


Liam grabs my arm again. I pull my arm out of his grip so hard that I fall. Liam stares at me in shock. I back up to the tree and sob into my sleeves. Liam stepped forward and embraced me his one of his soft, warm hugs.

“It’s okay, darling, It’ll be okay.”
And this time, I believed him.


The author's comments:

This peice was a random thought bubble that I decided to pop. Take this peice as you do, there is no specific way i'd like you to perceive this peice. Love is Love. Thank you for reading. Xx


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