It's Complicated

November 17, 2017
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Dear Diary,                                                                     11/5/17
      I’m Elliott, I am the one that is going to break all of the social laws. A 15 year old boy at my school is too busy trying to find a girl to even realize that we are all like a bunch of clones and I’m the glitch. I go to possibly the worst high school ever, Phillips High School; It’s a literal prison. Everyday I walk into this horrifying school thinking of everything I could do wrong and destroy my social life… as melodramatic as that sounds.

“Hey,”  I said, “did you miss me?” I whispered.
“ Why would I miss you , I don’t even know you, wait no one knows you” ,Emma growled.

I hate her so much she has ruined so many freshmen’s dreams. She is the queen of the school, along with her group of idiots. And I am just on the side making no difference in anyone's life, I have no purpose at this school at all. I have pushed down the past so much that all I want now is to blend in and never to be noticed at all. Then I met Scarlet.

      I saw her being bullied by Emma and then Toby stopped Emma. When I saw her for the first time all I noticed was her gorgeous purple hair. I hate to think that Scarlet is too scared to just say what she is thinking to Emma’s prissy face. Toby is the top boy of the school and he doesn’t even know it. He is a total jock and is trying very hard to bring up his grades so he can go to college but, to also find his way into the real world. [Scarlet is walking through the hall and spots Emma, a war is about to go down; where's my popcorn? Emma struts over and shoves her into the drinking fountain button, Scarlet is now covered in water.]

Then Emma turns around and sarcastically claims, “Oops , I didn’t mean to bump you.”


Toby walked through the door as usual at the perfect time and yelled, “Get away from her Emma, you little rat.”

I feel like Scarlet and I would be besties if we just never went to school or met Emma. I have the best ideas for art projects. I could get a group of people to help change the way the school works so we can be ourselves around each other and this school totally doesn’t need “ popular” rude people. I really hope this plan works, I really need friends. My parents are worried that I am depressed . They were wrong, I am just hiding my feelings from them because I know they would be disgusted of me and disown me. I at one time heard my parents saying that I was either depressed or hiding something from them.

         This sucks,
                Elliott Walsh

 

                                 1 month later

Dear Diary,                                                                 12/1/17
It’s me again, I’ve been thinking and trying my hardest to find the best way to tell my parents that I’m gay, but I can never find the right time to do it. Anyway, I now have friends they are  Scarlet the loner, Toby the jock, and Emma the mean girl. The only reason I let Emma be part of the group is because everybody hates her now. After a rumor had been spread that one of the freshmen's== killed herself because of Emma. So I explained my situation and at first it was really awkward but they have gotten used to it , I never had the guts to tell Toby. They told me that I should tell the school counselor about what I think my parents would do but I couldn’t. I feel like if I tell my parents they will split; I don’t want to ruin me and my little sister's life.
                                                      My life is complicated,
                                                                            Elliott Walsh

 

                                        2 weeks later


Dear Diary,                                                               12/15/17
       Today, I tried to tell my parents that I'm gay, it didn’t go so well I told them that I needed to talk to them and that it was serious but then I got so nervous that I told them that we need more cheerios, like what the heck was I thinking I don't even eat cheerios. I was so embarrassed after that I just went upstairs. Later my mom came to talk to me and I finally  told her that I was gay. She was really concerned but weirdly happy that I did something “stupid like a normal boy would do and that it was just a phase”. . . .
                                                                         What now,
                                                                               Elliott Walsh


                                    5 days later

 

Dear Diary,                                                              12/20/17
   I have decided to talk to parents and explain to them that is no joke anymore, I really do needed them to understand that I’m serious. I really like Toby and I was going to tell Scarlet but I overheard her talking to Emma.


  Scarlet whispered to Emma, “Hey what do you think about Toby?”


“He is such a little whiny baby, he is way to gullible and isn’t even that cute.” Emma murmured ,“ why do you like him?”


“ No thats pathetic , he is just always around, I wondered if you liked him.” Scarlet mumbled.


“ Well I don’t and no one would.” Emma smirked.


[Scarlet walks away with her head down]
                                                                   Why me,
                                                                         Elliott Walsh


                                    2 weeks later


Dear Diary,                                                                 1/1/17


       I have decided today will be the day I tell Toby that I like him even though my parents don’t believe me and take me seriously but they still think it is just a phase. Someday I will get them to realize this isn’t a phase. Today I walked into school and headed straight for Toby’s locker. He was standing there unpacking his books and I chickened out and ran into the men's restroom. So I locked myself in a stall for a few moments then I waited until I got enough courage and walked out there and he was gone. . . .

 

     So I got out my brand new pack of lilac sticky notes and I wrote I like you. I pushed it into the vent of the locker and went to my next class , nervously. After school, Toby walked over to me holding the note. I was screaming on the inside but on the outside I was as red as a tomato. He walked up and handed me a note and walked to the buses. He said nothing, nothing. This was the note that changed my life.

                                                                            Love,
                                                                               Elliott Walsh


                                    1 week later


Dear Diary,                                                                   1/8/17
      When I got home I opened the note and it said that he liked me to and to met him at the park at 4 pm next week but . . . . I couldn't read the rest it was too messy. I’m flipping out right, I’m excited but also horrified that his parents might have something against being gay or just don't believe him. I felt really happy for our date though. I wanted to totally scream but I realized that me and him are going through the same thing. I finally will have someone.
                                                                       Love,
                                                                            Elliott Walsh


                                 One month later

 

Dear Diary,                                                                2/17/17
  The date was great we had a beautiful picnic but then it started to rain so it ended real early but anyway we are best friends now and are now totally inseparable. I also figured out what came the but on the note. He is moving soon to LA with his aunt and he he doesn’t want to leave but I can’t make him stay that would be very selfish. So I told him that it is okay and he will find someone much better than me in the future . The day he is leaving is today. . . . I walked over to his house to say goodbye  and I gave him a huge hug . The problem was once he got in the car about to leave I  fell to the ground crying ashe drove away. He was the only person who understands me. I kept saying to myself that I would be fine without him and I will someday, but not today.
                                                                        Love,
                                                                             Elliott Walsh






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Anago0917 said...
today at 2:57 pm
i love yours @njbenwa052
 
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