The Inside of My Mind
                                       
I’m not sure what I’m doing here. It’s an oblivion that I cannot seem to find a light through. Trying to find out who I am and what I’m made out to be. I have high hopes for myself but I don’t know where to start my adventure. This…horrendous feeling of knowing you have to grow up is at its greatest when you’re teenager. My predicament is mostly going over my head but I know I must capture it before opportunity slips past me. I’m beginning to find out who I am, my personality, how I want my life to play out. I‘m not as nearly as intelligent as I may come off to you. I’m only in eighth grade. Next year after this one I’ll be in high school and it’s terrifying. I’m terrified and completely unprepared for these upcoming changes.
Can’t I just go back to the way things were? When I didn’t have to have a care in the world? When I had my friends with me saying “We’d always be together forever”? But what was forever? Forever was a limited amount of days until we found out we’d go separate ways. Forever was just elementary school. Forever was a dull, hidden future of endings and beginnings. I was never the one to not think deeply. I was the kid always looking for the deeper meanings and surprising myself with what I came up with. I seek the meanings and truths behind every promise made, truth told, lies spoken and believed. And honestly…I scare myself. My mind goes too deep and strains so hard to find my reasons behind my own truths, lies and promises. I scare myself to cry and fall apart piece by piece knowing that I can. Knowing how much I terrify myself. Sometimes I’m better left off oblivious to the secrets that life tempts me with.
Speaking with all sincerity may surprise you. Reading these words spilled out across paper from such a young girl is amazing yet unsettling. Imagine how I feel. I had no idea I could write with such immense truth, sincerity, comprehendible intelligence that a young adult has and or surpasses. Not bragging or showing off but I may have such a complicated mind that only I can decipher it and splatter the big picture on paper. In the form of a blissfully, dark, forward literature. But then again I can also be very wrong.
In another continuum I could be entirely wrong of my assumptions and life story. Too bad we haven’t found the technology or accessed 100% of our brains to reach the full power we have inside. It’s not so bad looking straight into the abyss of our own minds with open arms hoping to find a light. Though that light has always been ourselves waiting to be unleashed and create our world we have been given. But there’s always that time of when our world crumbles and lights must go out…