“Hello and welcome to your on board entertainment movie hour provided to you by Bosch Premium Bus Ride Entertainment. Please notice the six television displays along the ceiling of the cabin.”
There were six television displays but they were only screens on a black palette and were shaped like thumbs. Why would they ruin a perfectly quiet bus with six talking thumbs?
“We would like to congratulate Bus M33 for choosing the on board movie option package. This choice was made democratically by the very passengers on your bus when 33 out of 64 passengers selected the on board movie option in the premium features area of their ticket information. If you would like to vote in the future, be sure to check out the premium features section when you are purchasing your Megabus tickets.”
I heard Walker turn to his wife, “You ready to vote on your movie, hun?”
“I’m ready but no one has told me where I vote at,” said Walker’s wife Eve.
“That’s why they gave you the marker when you got on the bus, dear. I’m guessing you vote with that,”  Walker replied.
Eve then turned around in her aisle seat to her address her children but shouted her mind and addressed most of the bus a result. “Hey y’all quiet down and get out those markers I told you to hang on to. You’re gonna vote for the movie you’re gonna watch.”
“Picking your movie with Bosch Entertainment has never been easier. First, please locate the complimentary Megabus Marker that has been provided to you. If you do not have a Complementary Marker, please let your Ride Supervisor know and one will be provided to you.”
“Did you hear that?” Eve yelled to all her children, “Do y’all all have the markers you were suppose to not lose?”
“Second, a list of four movies each with a corresponding movie code will be displayed. After all four movies have been displayed, please write the movie code corresponding with your top movie choice in a visible location. The ride supervisor will then tally your votes and your movie will begin. First, Movie code PAN14 Jumanji starring Robin Williams. Second, Movie Code PIN16 Mrs. Doubtfire starring Robin Williams.”
“Pardon the interruption, this is your Ride Supervisor speaking, I saw on the news that Robin Williams killed himself yesterday. He was like my favorite actor so  I thought I’d grab DVD’s from my house that he was in in memoriam to his memory. Sorry for the interruption.”
Eve breathed in a mighty gasp that could’ve been mistaken for an open bus window. “I didn’t know he died! How’d he die?”
“Killed himself I think,” replied Walker, “but I don’t know I can’t watch the news anymore these days.”
“Third, Movie Code PEN15 Race to Witch Mountain starring Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson. Fourth, Movie Code PON17 RV starring Robin Williams. Please cast your votes now and your Ride Supervisor will tally them.”
Walker and Eve turned around to see what movie their children were voting to play. “Whatta ya guys voting for?” asked Walker. The children began to chant, “Dwayne-The-Rock! Dwayne-The-Rock!”
“I think they are voting for PEN15, hun.”
“I haven’t seen or heard of that movie so I wonder if it’ll be any good,” remarked Eve. Eve looked over-worked. It was as if she was having a hot flash or something. She kept turning and adjusting in the seat, which due to her weight, was a whole body endeavor. Constantly hovering over her seat while supporting herself with a hand on the back of the chair and twisting until her sides squeezed in between the arm rests wasn’t easy on her.
Eve asked, “How do you even cast your vote?”
“Just put it somewhere visible. Look, the kids are just writing it on their foreheads.”
“Okay which are you voting?”
“I’m not really gonna pay attention to the movie so I’m just voting with kids.”
“Fine. Help me write it on my forehead.”
The bus, as a community, got much tighter after voting. Most went with the forehead method which forced people to ask one another for assistance. This started many conversations and the chatter was a soft roar for quite awhile. I’m guessing most of them figured to keep up the chatter at least until the votes were counted by the Ride Supervisor.
Walker adressed his kids agian, “Yins think your movie is gonna win?”
Eve slapped Walker in the arm. “Don’t use that word you know it isn’t proper grammar.”
A stranger leans into the conversation. He voted for the Dwayne Johnson movie. “Do you guys say ‘yins’? I’ve heard of it but that’s the first time I’ve ever heard anyone use it. So y’all from Pittsburgh?”
Eve replied, “Yes but we live outside of the city so we never really hear it either. But my sister-in-law lives in the city and my husband’s whole side of the family are from around there so whenever it slips out I have to correct them. But it’s cute isn’t it? We call it Pittsburghese.”
“Yea it’s an interesting sounding dialect. You guys say other weird stuff as well. When I say ‘sweeper’ what do you think of?
“Well I don’t think it’s all that weird to call a vacuum cleaner a sweeper and I don’t think thats just a Pittsburgh thing.”
“Oh it’s only a little poll I’m doing on my travels. Some people consider a sweeper to be a broom.”
The loudspeaker returned. “Thank you for voting. Your ride has democratically chosen Movie Code PEN15 Race to Witch Mountain starring Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson.”
“I didn’t see the Ride Supervisor collect our votes. Did she come up to the top floor at all?” asked Eve.
“I didn’t see her.” replied Walker.
The stranger leaned into the conversation again. “They never bother to poll the top cabin. Only seen them do it once in all my bus travels.”
“Before the movie can begin, Bosch Entertainment needs to collect a $20 entertainment fee from the bus. The ride supervisor will be around with a donation basket shortly.”
The Ride Supervisor walked to the top cabin. She was in a bright yellow and orange Ride Supervisor uniform and carrying a wicker basket. One father let his young daughter put a dollar in the basket as she walked by.
“Hey Dad! Can we put money in?” asked one of Walker’s sons.
“ Sure,” Walker pulled out several $5 bills and passed them back. “Make sure y’all split up the money and be fair.”
“And don’t be jumping over each other neither,” added Eve. “C’mon it is just like church so behave.” As the Ride Supervisor walked by, Eve asked, “Excuse me ma’am, but I don’t think you tallied the top cabin’s votes.”
“Oh, sweetie yes I did,” replied the Ride Supervisor. “I did it all with the camera right up front there.” The Supervisor looked sad. “The Dwayne Johnson movie was pretty much unanimous downstairs.
The Supervisor kept walking to collect from the children. “Walker? Do you see a camera up there? I’m trying but you know my eyesight really bothers me.”
“I don’t know hun, but you know cameras and things are getting smaller and smaller every year.”
“Well you’d think that with all the tech on board they’d at least be able to work the temperature right. I’m dying of heat.” It was true. Eve looked bright red in the face and her skin was covered in a sweaty film.
“I’m alright with the temperature,” replied Walker. “Did you see the A/C thing in the Premium Features section?”
“No. You bought the tickets remember?”
“Yea well they do this bidding thing. They give control of the A/C to the highest bidder. I tried but the price was getting too high.”
“You should’ve gotten it. You know I can’t stand the heat.”
“Bosch Entertainment thanks you for your cooperation. Please enjoy your on board entertainment.”
“Walker, I’m not feeling too good.”
“Here. Let’s see if any of these windows open.”
Eve jumped to the window to pry it open but Megabus windows don’t open unless the bus is upside down. Eve vomited all over Walker’s upper body. The bus pulled over to the side of the highway. Dripping and silent, Walker wore an almost melancholy expression. He could see the sun set over a mountain from his window. The driver of the Megabus appeared in the top cabin. He slowly made his way to Walker.
“I apologize if your stay with us has been unsatisfactory, sir,” said the driver. “I would offer you and your family a refund but as you will see, a refund would have ultimately been pointless.”
“Why is that?” asked Walker.
“Because this is the Megabus to Hell.”
“What do you mean?”
“The bus will always pick the Dwayne Johnson movie. The Supervisor will never tally your vote. You will never bid high enough for the A/C with anything smaller than a written contract for your soul in partnership with the Boss himself. Your wife will always vomit all over you. And we will never make it to Hell. This is forever.”