October 31, 2013
I don’t think I will ever forgive him. He left me to wallow in pennies. And now guess what? Here I am, wallowing in pennies for the world to see.
Thoughts of my multiple families were enough to plague my mind. After all, who am I? Just another dancer fighting to sprawl over the face of the Earth? I thought Paris would lead the way to my ubiquity. I thought I would finally inhabit my purpose.
But some people just hate to listen.
I trusted him with the maintenance of all that I had ever left behind. A dying mother, an indebted father, and a war-torn town. He was supposed to work! He was supposed to fight! I had expected him to do all the things that I, in my aspirations, couldn’t do for my people. But why was I blaming him for the very negligence that dictated me?
Who was I to charge him with anything?
He had escaped his duties for the glories of the other side, the glories of New York. I didn’t initially know what to think upon discovering his choice to neglect my community, the calamity that now epitomized the Midwest. Samuel had left me to send the last vestiges of my livelihood to the family, but weren’t we guilty of the same crime?
Hadn’t we fallen victim to ambition?
And upon this question I had fallen into a pit. I was never to become a dancer.

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