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Dedication is My Meditaiton

Bright lights coming from under the door, I fix my shorts, tighten my pony and head for the door knob. And right before I open the door, it all comes flooding back to me, how I got here. I walked onto the bus, young pony low and clothes still young. I take my seat behind my step dad, the bus driver. He’s taking a group of cheerleaders to their competition in Albany. I wanted to tag along to just see what these girls were like. I was shy and nervous. I decided I would keep quiet and observe. The bus started to move making its way to the highway I already got lost in tangles of the trees until someone tapped on my shoulder. She was a redhead, and fair skinned girl, beautiful if I may say so myself. As stunning as she was, I was nervous. Bring it on being my favorite movie, I thought she would be like the cheerleader big red, and I was immediately scared for life ready to run. Instead she said “Hey there pretty girl! What's your name?” She had so much pep in her words. “I’m Autumn “So quietly she could tell I was nervous. “Well Autumn I’m Charity! And she reached her hand out for a shake. It was almost instant then that I knew one day I would want to be just like her. She broke the ice for me and the team as well to talk to me. And as they got off the bus I knew this would be the start me wearing my ponytail high.

Middle school was my year to shine. And I did everything I could to prepare for the rapidly approaching high school years of my life. 8th grade has come to an end and cheer tryouts would be coming up the following year. I was nothing but excited for it, but my dream was coming to an end. My birth father bullied me to no end for my weight. I wasn’t even chubby; I was a normal size child. And even though I knew this the words still sunk in deeper, straight to my feelings. I didn’t eat anything, I refused. All could think about was making daddy happy, and being as perfect as I could be. I quickly went into having anorexia. I never felt good, and couldn't do much. Cheer tryouts were right around the corner and I thought this was it; everything I hoped and dream for was gone. Even with all the doubt I had I pushed myself and landed it on the JV cheerleading squad, and was beyond happy.

10th grade came faster than ever. Tryouts were easier than last year. Every girl who tried out made it, and even though we all had our doubt and flaws we made the best of it. And although I felt like I made it because everyone else did, I quickly got reminded of why I was really here and landed myself as Captain that year. The year ended with more than half the team gone, but I still knew we could do it, and that I could never leave something I loved dearest.

It was almost an instant as 11th grade made it to my life. I dressed like no one else. I began to create my full personality and express who I was more than ever before. I wanted to be seen and talked about for my 3 inch heel and higher. I wanted to be known for my outgoing style and my long dirty blonde hair. I attended cosmetology school for half the day to have something to get me a job, to make money, which would push me through college to my real dream as an art therapist. I use that to my advantage. Cheer tryouts consisted of over 30 girls. And I ended up trying out by myself, against the rules, with cheer words I stole from previous year, which was also against the rules. I try and think back to talent shows I would be in before this that I was completely confident in and loved doing, but now I would have to fight for this. I tried out and during my tryouts, I missed a jump. And in the tryout you needed all four. As soon as I left the judges presence all I could do is cry. I couldn't tumble like most girls and I messed up in more ways than one. I thought this is it for me. But soon enough the list was up, and right at the top of the Varsity list was my name Autumn Shaneclair. And I managed to prove myself again landed me Co-Captain of the team.

Then the summer before 12th grade. I was working as a back person in a restaurant cleaning. I was mopping when I stepped back and slipped. The way I landed fractured my ankle and broke my arm. I fractured my ankle slipping and broke my arm trying to break the fall. My ankle would be fine by October just in time for tryouts, but my arm would not be until January, way after tryouts. That year was the only year I didn’t attended talents shows, or the cheer team. I still sat on the bench with my cheer bow and high pony, but no uniform. It was really over now. I focused more on my academics getting on high honor and receiving several scholarships. I was never more depressed at this state I was in.


In my first year of college I received a letter in the mail. It was from the Dallas cowboy cheerleaders. This brought me by complete shock because it was always a secret dream of mine to make it onto their team. The letter said:

“Dear Autumn Shaneclair, We are please to inform you that due to your outstanding talents and straight passion for cheerleading we personally invite you to come and tryout for the 2015-2016 seasons.” I could read no more on the letter and I screamed in excitement. At the end of the letter it said “The Dallas cowboy cheerleaders and you former high school team”. If it wasn’t for them I wanted get this opportunity. The believed in me and I couldn’t thank them more.

Bright lights coming from under the door, I fix my shorts, tighten my pony and head for the door knob. Team behind me and pompoms in hand we go out screaming. The crowds cheers become louder and louder. We make it to the beginning to start our opening game kick line and sing the national anthem. My mind and ears go quit as I thank everyone for this moment. And I look around at the camera flashes, helping recreate my flashbacks. And the smiling faces and cheers all for us. And I close my eyes just for a second and open them quick to remind myself that this is no longer a dream, but my life.




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CammySThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
today at 8:04 pm:
The message behind the story is really nice, but there are a few grammer mistakes that make this story hard to read at some points. I liked watching Autumn's progression from shy girl to Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader, but I think that the story would have been more effective if instead of telling the story, you showed it. Do you know what I mean? The plot was nice but if the action was actually taking place instead of us being informed that it occured the story would be a ... (more »)
 
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