Dear Evan, | Teen Ink

Dear Evan,

January 26, 2012
By Anonymous

Dear Evan,
I don’t know how to describe this. It is just too weird. For twelve whole years in my life you were always twenty feet away from me and were even closer to me personally. Now you are physically still the same distance away but personally you could be worlds apart. I wish that I could get close to you again but every time I talk to you, you are so formal and polite it makes me want to puke . I guess you don’t feel like that because you have the same unfeeling answers.
I guess I should start by saying that you have left a painful permanent stain on the past three years of my life that I can never get rid of. I am almost positive that I did not have the same effect on you but I guess that really doesn’t matter. I feel guilty and responsible for letting our friendship fall apart. We were once best friends, but then you moved to a different school and for some odd reason I was mad at you for that. After this, I figured that if you wanted to come see me you would. I kept waiting but you never came so we just drifted farther and farther apart…
I know nothing about you so I have no clue how you know about me (unless you stalked me on facebook, but that is probably too much for me to hope for). You still think that I am the silly ten year old who burnt the Rice Sides in the microwave, but really you have no clue who I am now or what I do. I guess what I am trying to say is that I am not the girl who burnt stuff in the microwave anymore. I have a whole new life that you are not a part of. I don’t know if that hurts you like it does me but I guess I just have to let you know.
Since you have been gone, I have been through a lot of hardships that you weren’t there for. Before, when something went amiss, I could always come to you, but after all that you missed, I can’t say a word to you that I really mean. I miss you, but I can deal with out you and I don’t depend on you anymore. This is me letting go because I have held on for three years too long. Personally, I don’t know why I am telling you all of this because it makes me look completely pathetic, but here it is anyway.
I hope you have a great life. When you grow up, I hope you remember me. I know I certainly won’t forget you, but I will not dwell on me letting you go either. I wish you the best of luck and happy belated birthday.
-Skye-



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