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Darkness.

I sit there. Quivering. Chin buried in knees. Clutching on to my hands.

I want to scream. But my voice is lost.

In the darkness.

“Where are you?”

I perk my ears, listening to the voice. Sweet. Soft. Canorous. It's the only thing I've heard since yesterday night.

“Rebecca, where are you?”

Listening to him utter my name, I feel my heart melt. I feel myself dissolve into the darkness. When was the last time I had ever heard my name? I'm not sure.

“Rebecca, I know you're in here. Come out.”

Silence. I don't respond.

“Beck, we can do this. Hear me out, please.”

More silence. I want to answer. I want to reach up and grab his hand. I want to fall into his embrace and forget about everything that has happened. Everything. Absolutely everything.

“Beck, do you hear me?”

His voice seeps through my ears and I finally let out a sigh. I see my breath stream from my mouth and realize how cold it really is down here.

“I can hear you,” I answer, shivering. I want to stand up, but I'm terrified. Darkness—that's the only thing around me. I've already lost myself. Into this darkness. “Leave me alone. Please.”

“I won't,” he says, firmly. “Not until you get out of there. You can't spend the rest of your life camped out in the cellar.”

He's right. I murmur a curse underneath my breath. Trembling for only a moment, I finally stand up. My legs are cramped from being hunched up for so long. I feel awkward, standing up.

Slowly, I walk up the stoned steps of the cellar. Away from the darkness.

I see him. He's kneeling on the top step, holding out a hand. I don't take it.

“Don't be like this,” he begs. I see his forehead crease with vexation. For me. For his future. For our future. “You're almost twenty, Beck. Act like it.”

“Don't tell me what I should or shouldn't be doing,” I vent. My lips are quenched, parched, and numb. Twenty-four hours without food, water, and a blanket can be very enervating, if I must say so.

Seconds turn into minutes. He doesn't say anything. So don't I. We sit there. Side by side. Something we had always done.

“I'm leaving,” he claims. I hear his voice tense up and I shudder. “Today, Beck. Right now.”

“Why?” I inquire. I realize it's a childish question. Why? Why was everything the way it was? Why was life unfair? Why did it have to end up like this?

The clock ticks louder, mixing in with the pattering of my own heart. For a moment, I wonder whether he has lost his own voice—the way I had lost mine. In the darkness. The petrifying world I had spent twenty-four hours in.

“I've got to do this,” he retaliates. Gently. I feel his breath on my head. I sense his eyes watching me. Watching my every movement. My expression. I give none. “It's important. Our people need defense. I'm doing this, not for myself, but for every American out there. Bear with me, Beck.”

I shake my head. No, I don't want to bear with him. I feel tears fill up my eyes, and I start bawling.

“You don't have to do this,” I sob, burying my face in my knees. “Don't go. Don't leave me.”

“Rebecca, I'm sorry,” he whispers. His arms drape around me and I am leaning against him. I feel his chest rise and fall with his every breath. “I'll be back. I promise.”

“What if you don't make it?” I query, acknowledging the fact that I was pushing this too far. “Joining the army is dangerous. What if something happens?”

Silence.

More silence.

Perpetual silence.

He knows that he won't come back. He knows that he's risking his life for nothing. I know. He knows.

Tears drip from my chin.

Drip.

Down.

Onto my lap.

He lets go.

And I fall. My head rests along the concrete floor. My cheek is bruised. My auburn hair falls across my eyes. I see darkness. Once again.

Darkness.

It's around me. Suffocating me.



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This article has 14 comments. Post your own!

I like pie said...
Oct. 16, 2011 at 8:53 pm:

Marrage is important because if you do it right, YOU WILL SPEND THE REST OF ETERNITY WITH THEM.

 And if you arn't commited enought to get married, they you arn't commited enought to have a kid.

 
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I like pie said...
Oct. 2, 2011 at 7:36 pm:

This is about your latest forum  post, about how mabey there isn't a God. I'm not a member on this website yet, so I couldn't comment there. So here I am. 

 I think most of your probloms can be answered  by my religion. I'm mormon. As far as no one deserving h.ell, I want to  tell you what we belive about that. (see next post)

 
I like pie replied...
Oct. 2, 2011 at 7:38 pm :
We belive that instead of only heaven and h.ell, there are three main 'degrees of glory'. and subsections in each. We also belive that you almost always have a chance to move up, through missionary work. Missionary work done by people from the highest heven. (see next post)
 
I like pie replied...
Oct. 2, 2011 at 7:42 pm :

Missionary work is why heaven won't be boring. Plus, If your good enough, you get to be a God of a whole 'nother universe. But that's another story. 

 About the whole 'parents brainwashing you' thing' who says you have to either belong to your parents church or no church? Why not reasearch other churches? (see next post)

 
I like pie replied...
Oct. 2, 2011 at 7:45 pm :

(I suggest mormonisum. We rock.)

respond to this comment if you want to know more. 

 
I like pie replied...
Oct. 2, 2011 at 7:51 pm :
OH MY GOSH! I was just reading your complaints on the forum, and you asked a question I can TOTALLY answer. Another answer heaven won't be boring is that you get to be with you family. (freinds too, probably. I'm not sure.) That is one of the main things mormons do; that is, making sure familys can be together forever. (see next post.)
 
I like pie replied...
Oct. 2, 2011 at 7:55 pm :

IT  HAPPENED AGAN!

 the reason why people change the bible is mainly political, but we belive that there are still prophets on the earth (long story) and they have gone over the Bible and, using the power of Go.d, put it back in its orginal words. 

 
I like pie replied...
Oct. 2, 2011 at 7:59 pm :
You toached on something I want to discuss; dieing young. This also has to do with the missonary-work-after-death thing. Being in heaven dosn't mean you get to sit back and do nothing. There is pleanty of work to do there. If someone dies young, that means thier main work is in the afterlife, not mortal life. 
 
I like pie replied...
Oct. 2, 2011 at 8:02 pm :

I just prayed for you. 

God loves you. 

I love God. 

Amen.  

( : 

 
I like pie replied...
Oct. 6, 2011 at 6:08 pm :

Okay, so either you didn't read this stuff, or you compleatly ignored it. 

But my quest to answer your questions goes on. 

About the whole 'fear him' thing, I think you are supposed to fear him, but not becuse of the he.ll thing. Fear him becuse at the moment, like it or not, he has a lot of power over our souls. But like I mentioned prior to this (ooh. I just used one of my vocablary words. Yha me.) We have the oppertunity to become Gods ourselfs. 

 I... (more »)

 
I like pie replied...
Oct. 6, 2011 at 8:16 pm :
Okay, how many times will I have to post on this story? I haven't even read the thing!  But you not listining aside, The reason we have challanges is that Mortal life is a test. One thing mormons belive is that a whole lot of things happened to us before we were born. One of the things that happened was we were told how hard our life would be, and asked if we still wanted a body. If you are here, you said yes. So whatever you're going through, rember you agreed to it. 
 
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CarrieAnn13 said...
Aug. 24, 2011 at 12:47 pm:
Wow, that was truly amazing!  All the short sentences were kind of annoying, but that's just my personal opinion and you used them to great effect.  This piece was short, yet very powerful.  The emotions of Rebecca can really be felt when you read this.  I also love how you introduced the backstory just enough so readers knew what was going on, but not so much that it was boring.
 
leafyThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Sept. 12, 2011 at 6:07 pm :
wow. just wow -- i can't believe i haven't read this yet! i loove this, and keep righting, kay?
 
ButterflyKiss replied...
Sept. 24, 2011 at 5:05 pm :
Oh. My. Gosh. *Has a moment* This is just... Josie! This is awesome! I love the detail, the emotion, the drama! I could practically feel how Becca was feeling. And the darkness... Woo. My mind has been blown away.
 
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