The Secrets We Keep

April 8, 2011
There he laid, all sprawled out. His hair a mess, it stuck straight up in places. Suspended there by the grease of late night sweat. He groaned and rolled over.

“Just another day,” he thought, “Why can't I just sleep it all way?”

Now upright, he sat on the edge of his bed. His hand on his chest, he sat there rubbing it. His mind wandered now. He could never keep his attention on one thing. Already in the bathroom now, he found himself still massaging his aching chest.

“Boy, this really hurts,” he mumbled to himself as he took of his shirt to examine his chest.

“What was that? Did you say something to me, Xavier? What do you want for breakfast?,” his mother called from the kitchen, her voice tense, she was obviously annoyed this morning.

Having discovered no visible signs of bruising, he shrugged it off and slipped back into his shirt. His mind was in too many places and the pain in his chest soon left his thoughts. Now deep into his morning routine, he had completely forgotten that his mother had said something to him. His mother's head now peaked around the corner,

“Xavier, answer me!,” she shrieked, “I will not be ignored!”

He jumped, causing him to drop his toothbrush. It hit the counter, water and toothpaste erupted all over his shirt. This angered him, but he was too startled to pay much attention to the damage. His voice somewhat shaky now, Xavier managed to mutter, “Sorry, Mom. What did you say?”

“What's the point of talking if no one in this house hears a word I say!?,” she yelled as she stormed off down the hall.

This had no effect on Xavier. It was a constant war against everyone in his family. He hated yelling and fighting, but it was something he had to live with daily. Everyday was the same old struggle for him. Dealing with everything that life threw at him and he felt so alone in all this mess. Except, he had one person that he could always count on and that was, Syri. She was his only real friend and he could not wait to see her today. His palms grew sweaty at the thought. He was always so nervous around her, even though they were the best of friends.

Now on the bus, Xavier scanned the rows in search of Syri. There she was, right in the middle row. As he walked towards the seat, he just gazed into her eyes.

“God, she is so beautiful,” he muttered to himself, “Why can't she be mine?”

“Didn't catch that one, X,” she said drowsily.

“Oh, nothing. How was your weekend?”

“Well...,” she drew in a deep breath, gathering her thoughts, “It was pretty fun being able to get out of town and sing for the concert. Being in front of so many people was pretty crazy though. What about yours?”

“I would have loved to go and see you perform. You have the most beautiful singing voice. But... I don't want to talk about mine...,” he sighed, his eyes now fixated on his feet.

The bus hit a bumped and the shock jolted him back up, but his eyes still shown the pain that his heart felt. He really did not want to talk about it. Syri always managed to get what was wrong out of him though.

“That never flies with me and you know it,” she smirked, “I know you better than anyone, you can't hide a single thing from me. Now come here, buddy. Tell me all about it.”

“Well, alright,” he groaned, “You asked for it...”





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