The Sociopath's Girlfriend

March 16, 2011
The day I found out my true love was a sociopath scarred me. Or should I say scared me. I’ve never been the same. Not only has it been hard that I realize someone I care about is literally crazy, but also I have realized that in the three years that he told me he loved me, it was impossible. A sociopath is incapable of loving. But now the only question I have is, if I still love him am I considered crazy?

“Ashley you should be happy you dumped me,” he said.

In awe I starred at him. I didn’t dump him first of all, he dumped me. And second of allover the last three years he has been begging to be with me, and yet once I fall in love with him he pushes me away.

“Why?” I asked.

“Because you don’t know anything about me. You think you do, but you really don’t.”

When he said that I laughed. Because the funny thing was that I probably knew him better than anyone. I know every look in his eyes, and every smile, or frown. I know his hands shake when he’s mad, and I know he punches things when he’s beyond mad. I know that family is the most important thing to him. And I know that his heart is so big that he could feel any sort of sadness or happiness for any person or being.

“How?” I questioned.

“I can’t feel anything,” he responded.

“How?” I laughed, “What do you mean?”

“Look up the definition of a sociopath and tell me if you still want to be with me.”

I’ve heard of a sociopath before. It was the type of guy in scary movies that was crazy and murdered people. But I had some sort of hope that there was a second definition that was good.

Sociopath: Someone who can’t maintain a steady relationship. Or steady environment. They particularly can’t have any sort of feelings for anything. Define some as crazy.

After I read that I had chills all over my body. He was right; this guy wasn’t who I thought he was. But yet surprisingly it didn’t change the way I felt about him. And for that I felt like I was crazy. Somehow it made me love him more.

“Yeah…so.” I replied.

“Did you read it?” He asked.

“Yes I did,” I said.

“And?” He asked.

“And I still think even though you’re diagnosed with an illness you’re still the guy I fell in love with. And that’s not going to change.” I smiled

“Really?” He smiled back.

“Yes,” I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him. And he kissed back. It was the most psychotic kiss you would have ever seen.

I know what your thinking. I’m crazy right? Well I’m crazy in love with a crazy boy who can’t love me back but is psychotically in love with the idea of loving me. What can I say? His love is my hallucination, and that has made me crazy.

Join the Discussion

This article has 3 comments. Post your own now!

notsoaveragematt said...
Mar. 20, 2011 at 9:30 am
Who knows, he could still be a good guy...
bigdreamsbigheart replied...
Mar. 22, 2011 at 8:33 am

Yeah the truth is he could be a great guy. It's just what he makes of himself. I'm not saying that people that are a sociopath are incapable of being loved, because in this peice I showed that this girl is still in love with the guy. It show that even though she knows something bad about him, she ends up feeling close too him and knows more about his life. And that makes her feel like he has opened up to her. And for that she loves him, and accepts him. And now he makes her psychotically in l... (more »)

RobbieTheGirl said...
Mar. 19, 2011 at 6:19 pm
I understand and feel for you.  I fell in love for the first time in my life and he turned out to be gay
Site Feedback