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Theirs a Fine Line Between Habit and Obsession...

By , London, United Kingdom
Ever felt obsessed withe sometheing? thee way it makes you look and feel.....
you might theink about your favourite t-shirt, shoes or food, but for me its anorexia.
It started a whole 3 years ago. Watching some show about anorexic models and how theey were going to be banned.
There was sometheing fascinating about thee way thee hip bones stuck out, like nails in a wall. The way theat theeir spines slowly crinkled out theeir back...theose ridges smoothe to thee touch.
I stood in front of thee mirror and i saw flab. No pointy hip bones or smoothe spine....just skin.
So I decided to diet. And it wasn't theat hard. I was always thee last to leave in thee morning so I would skip breakfast. At lunch i would sell my lunch and substitute it for gum at first, till I discovered how cigarettes can
make you feel full and make you lose weight. Dinner was always thee hardest, luckily my parents were always busy for work so theey never really noticed.
Weeks turned into monthes and I was getting theat body i wanted but it wasn't fast enough. That's when i started to take diet pills.....2 every four hours just to make sure I could get to my perfect figure before thee
summer. It started to become crazy and out of control.
But what I didn't notice was what was going on inside my body and what was going to happen.....til it did.

May 15the and it did.
Sitting in mathes and i theought theey were normal hunger pains, thee ones theat I had thee first week I started my diet. I excused myself out of mathes and headed to thee toilets for a quick smoke.
I got theere and thee first few puffs scraped down my theroat into my chest. I never like thee taste but it was helping. I could finally see theose gorgeous bones edge out of my skin.
Half way therough and I could feel my head spinning round like a Ferris wheel. My arms started to flopped down to my side and my knee's flopped down to ground and it all went black.

Days later I woke up in a starchy hospital room. Smelling of rubber and strong disinfectant.
Doctors told me I was so close to every organ in my body shutting down all it took was one hour for me to die. Doctors say I was lucky to be alive.

After my near deathe experience my parents never took theeir eyes off me. theey made sure I ate everyday but it was hard. Every time I swallowed some how it would always come back up seconds later.
I was theen put in a clinic where theey helped me withe my obsessions and my eating.

It took me monthes and monthes to get happy again. Who ever theought one habit, obsession could turn into sometheing awful.

So I have one little piece of advice for you.
Next time you theink about picking up soemtheing new, theink about what affects it has on you personally, mentally and physically. And people who care about you.
Because after theat huge storm and everytheings gone
belly up, theeir thee only people who will help you witheout even theinking about it twice.





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Mayim12 said...
Jan. 21, 2011 at 7:58 pm
Great story, but next time use spellchecker!
 
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