Don't Kill Me Now | Teen Ink

Don't Kill Me Now

July 9, 2010
By Babylufin GOLD, Liberal, Missouri
Babylufin GOLD, Liberal, Missouri
13 articles 2 photos 229 comments

Favorite Quote:
"'For I know the plans I have for you', declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11. Thank you Lord, for this future you've given me.


I could see him, but no one else could. I could tell that they couldn’t, because if they had, they wouldn’t still be laughing, drinking, and acting as if there wasn’t a care in te world. I was the only one that could see him. I stopped laughing, put my drink on the counter, and stared at him; the blonde boy with bright green eyes.

He was standing there, looking at me, in mangled clothes, barefoot. His shirt was ripped from the armpit all the way down, on the left side. There were numerous holes in it. His cargo shorts looked like they had been through a shredder, but were still somewhat wearable. There was nothing on his feet, but it looked like he’d just witnessed a messy murder and got blood all over his legs and feet. Although, when I looked behind him, from the direction he must have come, there was no blood on the off-white carpet.

We just stared at one another, each knowing that only I could see him. At first he seemed a little reluctant on communicating any further. But then I saw the corners of his mouth turn up, almost in a smile.

He didn’t speak.

Could he speak?

Obviously, he was a ghost of some sort…could he be heard, though? And how was it that I could see him?

In the midst of my frantic thoughts on this beautiful, but frightening creature, he nodded his head towards the door: apparently indicating for me to follow him.

“Umm, hey, you guys, I don’t think I should drive home. I’m going to go call my sister to come get me,” I said to my friends, or rather the people who considered themselves my friends, but really they were only the people I drank with.

Sasha, the flamboyant redhead, yelled (although there was no need, she was two seats away from me at the round table we were sitting at), to me “Hey, Claire! Don’t go yet! The party has just begun!” If the party just begun, they were in for a long night, and a painful morning. She laughed a trilling laugh. She was so loud, even when she wasn’t drunk.

The rest of the group joined in, laughing, screeching, and yelling “Don’t go Claire! Don’t go Claire! The party’s just begun, Claire!”

At the rate these guys were babbling on, and the fact that I was with them the whole time, you would probably think to yourself, She probably didn’t even see that guy; she’s just as drunk as the others. That wasn’t the case, though. For some reason, today didn’t feel right. I only had a couple of drinks, I was too deep in thought the whole night to let loose with those imbeciles.

I left them howling, to follow the beautiful blonde boy out the door, and found him waiting for me at the corner of the road, sitting on the curb. Apparently he knew he was dead; no sane person that was alive would sit on the curb of the road in this part of town, on this specific road, especially.

“I’m not going to sit there,” I said as I approached him. I didn’t know if he could hear me, but he must, because he is the one that wanted me out here. But had he done this before? Did he even know if he would be able to hear me? Or I, him? I didn’t know.

He looked up, and I knew he could hear me.

“Yeah, I know,” he said, his voice stunning. Not only because I didn’t think I’d be able to hear him, but because it was so sweet, so smooth, so soft, like a piece of caramel in my mouth. Or like melancholy lyrics playing through my headphones into my ears, making me smile at lost memories. “What took you so long?” He got to his feet, and came near me.

“Umm, maybe drunken friends that are insistent I get as drunk as them?”

“Why do you do that, Claire? Don’t you know it’s bad for you? You’re only sixteen. You have your whole life ahead of you.” First, how did he know my name? Second, how did he know my age? The third question, though, was a little more obvious (how did he know I drank), considering the first time he saw me, I had a beer in my hand. But, really, one beer here and there won’t do much harm. He couldn’t have known that it wasn’t only one beer here and there, for me. Besides, he didn’t look like he could be much older than me; 18, maybe 19. He had to have had a few drinks here and there, himself.

“How do you know my name?” I asked him. “Or my age? How do you know anything about me?”

“I’m not quite sure, I haven’t been this way very long so I haven’t figured much out yet, but somehow, I just know. I also know that you’ve been an alcoholic since you were 12. You really should stop that Claire. Live your life while you can,” he said.

I sat down in the grass beside the sidewalk, and looked around to see if anyone was out here, watching me talk to thin air.

“I am living. Anyways, where did you come from? What happened to your clothes? Why am I the only one that can see you?”

He looked upset that the subject had changed.

“I came from over there,” he pointed down the road, where two cars sat, smashed together at the intersection of two roads. There were two police cars, a fire truck, and two ambulance trucks.

How I didn’t see the lights before he pointed it out, I didn’t know either. It seemed I didn’t know a lot of things at this point.

He continued, “Obviously, I was in a car wreck. You would think, since I’m a ghost or whatever you want to call it, I wouldn’t wearing the same clothes I died in, but a long white gown like everyone says. Sadly, though, I’m not in a long white dress, but in torn up clothes that I died in; bummer. That will be a pleasant memory to keep forever.” He smiled. “And for the last question, it probably has something to do with when you were a baby. Since you died when you were a baby, you’ve probably carried that gift with you, the ability to see…dead people.” He laughed at his lame joke. But I had no idea what he was talking about. I didn’t die when I was a baby…and I’d never seen ‘dead people’ before either. “Oh. You didn’t know, did you?”

He must have been able to read it on my face.

“No. It’s not true. I didn’t die when I was a baby, obviously. I’m here, like, I’m actually here, people can see me.”

“They were able to revive you. They won’t be able to revive me. Trust me, I saw what I looked like.” He laughed again.

Okay, this might just be me, but if I had just died, and I knew I was dead, I wouldn’t be making jokes quite yet, and I definitely wouldn’t be that calm.

“Alright, well, let’s say that makes sense. Still, I’ve never seen people like you before. Why now?”

“Yes, you have. You just didn’t pay any attention before. The pull wasn’t as hard to them, because you didn’t have much in common.” He flashed a bright, heart-stopping smile at me.

“And what have you and I got in common? What makes your pull stronger?”

“Well, to begin with, we both have, or in my case had, poor excuses as parents. And also, I’ve been an alcoholic for 6 years, since I was 12.”

See, I told you he had to have had a few drinks, a little more than a few though, it sounds like. But what right did he have, telling me how to live my life, when he was the same way?

“Don’t talk about my parents; you don’t know them. And I find it amazing that you were just telling me how to live my life when it came to drinking, and as it turns out, you did it too! Typical, people trying to tell me what to do, that have no room to talk. Look at you! You’re dead, if you haven’t noticed!” I screamed at him, with a sudden hatred for putting his nose where it didn’t belong; in my life.

After I said it though, and saw the hurt expression on his face, I automatically wished to take it back.

He finally spoke, after a long, awkward silence.

“I know that I’m dead, and you will be too, if you keep it up. Trust me. Can you really see me? Because this is what you’ll look like, if not worse. I’m dead, because of me. Because I didn’t handle my problems how I should have, I got drunk, jumped in a car, and ran a stop sign, right into another car.

“There were always people asking me, checking on me, to see if I was okay, and instead of talking to one of them, I downed another bottle of beer. My father was always the one that gave it to me, too.” He laughed with no humor what-so-ever.

I heard someone stumble out the door of the house, and fall down. I didn’t even look up to see who it was, or if they were okay. I kept looking at the ghost I was having a conversation with, and whose name I didn’t even know. I thought about what my life had become, and what it was becoming. To me, every night was a constant party. The party never stopped. But within me…I knew it was just a getaway. My parents divorced when I was 6. They constantly fought, physically, verbally, and emotionally. I was always the witness, me and my older sister by 1 year and 4 months, Andrea.

We went through custody battle, after custody battle, but the results were always the same; my mother, the drunk, and physically abusive, but nobody noticed, always got primary custody, while my father, the pot head, and dead beat, only got visitation once every month.

I had to live with the psychotic mother every day of my life. When she hit me, I took it without a sound. When she was drunk, I stole a few and ran to my room. My sister always stayed in her room for the most part. She never even tried one of our mom’s beers that I knew of. She got hit just as much as I did, and she ignored it as much too, if not better.

My father didn’t have a job, he was on Welfare from the day he turned eighteen. He smoked cocaine on a regular basis, and was verbally abusive when he was high, but I would have rather lived with him any day of my life; that just shows how much System really cares.

My mother was still an alcoholic, but I think since Andrea started playing sports, and I was never home, she grew tired and scared of the two of us; hasn’t laid a hand on either of us since Andrea was a freshman in high school.

My dad though, he died from an overdose when I was 12. Although he was never really a dad to me, that affected me in a terrible, huge way. I began heavy drinking, to get rid of the pain I felt from my parents, the hatred I felt from my schoolmates, the abandonment I felt from my sister, and the disappointment I felt in myself.

I snapped back to life when I heard the person on the porch puking up their guts.

“I’ll be right back,” I whispered to Ghost Boy.

I got up and ran over to the porch, to check on the girl that sat there, hair in her face, puke on her mouth, and mumbling something like “I got to stop doing that”.

I didn’t recognize the girl, but I asked her if she was okay. She nodded slightly, so I asked her if there was anyone I could call to give her a ride home. She shook her head, and mumbled something I could barely make out to be “on her way”. So, I told her if she needed me, I’d be over at the stop sign, and I went back to where Ghost Boy was sitting, looking down the street at where his body lay on the ground in a body bad.

I saw beside him.

“What’s your name?” I asked.

“Eric.”

Eric, I thought.

“What were you think about, before you left?” He asked me.

“Why I am the way I am.”

“You’re not the way you are. You’re completely different. You just haven’t found that yet.” He still wasn’t looking at me, but I looked at him. When I didn’t reply, he looked away from the wreck, to finally gaze into my eyes.

When he did that, I felt something strong pull me towards him, like the whole universe shifted. I didn’t notice before how shockingly beautiful he really was. I wasn’t one of those things you can explain to someone. His skin was fair and even, his face hard, but kind. He reminded me of a rose. Beautiful, a meaning of love, but still protected when it came to being hurt. His eyes were a green that can’t be explained. There isn’t a name for this color of green. He had full eyelashes, a shade darker than his beautiful blonde hair.

I reached my hand out to touch his and wasn’t completely stunned when I could feel it under my hand. It looked like he was though, like someone had just shocked him with a taser.

He reached his other hand up to cup my face.

“You’re beautiful, Claire,” he said. I didn’t understand what he was talking about. I’d never been called beautiful before. I was average sized, but when it came to looks, it wasn’t me you were looking for. Long, curly black hair, that never stayed tamed. Big, brown eyes that looked stoned all the time. My upper lip was half the size of my lower. What he said didn’t make sense to me. “Don’t ever let anyone tell you otherwise, even yourself.”

He leaned in to me, to gently kiss me on the lips.

The sensation I felt when he did that, is nothing I can describe; unbelievable, indescribable, pure joy. It felt like his lips were formed to match mine, like a puzzle; they were made specifically for me.

When he relinquished me, we both looked towards the wreck again. I felt his hand slide out from under mine, and when I looked to see where it went, he was walking away from me, towards his body. He made the two-block walk in only a few seconds. I saw him lie down beside himself, and scoot himself over, into his body.

I ran as fast as I could, over to where he lay, and stared at his beaten up face. He had black and blue bruises covering his entire face. His neck was a deep purple.

When I looked at his unmoving chest, I felt my own chest tighten, and my heart sank.

A cop came over to me, with a worried look on his face, wishing I hadn’t seen what I had.

“Can I help you with something, Hun?” he asked, like he cared as much for me as he would his own daughter. I looked back down at Eric. I started with his eyes, down to his obviously broken nose, to his purple, frozen lips. Then down to his broken neck. When I got to his chest again, I blinked.

It was moving.

He was breathing.

“HE’S BREATHING!” I shouted, I screeched, I screamed, a blood-curdling, death scream, frightened to no end. “HE’S BREATHING!” I pushed the cop forwards, toward Eric, frantic. “Save him! Save him! Please,” I cried, quieter, helpless. “Please, save him. I need you to save him.

“I love him.”


The author's comments:
Love inspires me everyday. It comes in all shapes and sizes, and brings more emotions than just itself.

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This article has 100 comments.


Babylufin GOLD said...
on Aug. 11 2010 at 11:58 am
Babylufin GOLD, Liberal, Missouri
13 articles 2 photos 229 comments

Favorite Quote:
"'For I know the plans I have for you', declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11. Thank you Lord, for this future you've given me.

I will!

I also posted Part 2 to this, if anyone is interested. :)


on Aug. 10 2010 at 6:40 pm
MustangWriter1813 PLATINUM, Crooks, South Dakota
45 articles 7 photos 128 comments

Favorite Quote:
" No one can told you back besides yourself " MaKayla Claymore class of 2013

I have a new story out called Im just going to end it all check it out when you can! Comment and rate it for me!

on Aug. 3 2010 at 2:11 pm
MyConstRuctd_IdentiTy SILVER, Chardon, Ohio
7 articles 56 photos 356 comments

Favorite Quote:
"One heartbeat."

"Our scars remind us of where we've been; they don't dictate where we're going."
-SSA David Rossi, Criminal Minds

Yes, they do. So, it's up to you, and you only wether or not you want to make this a prologue, or a chapter one and make another prologue, or just a chapter one, and not make a prologue at all. Just thought of that last one. :) Thanks, and I'll let you know!

Babylufin GOLD said...
on Aug. 3 2010 at 12:48 pm
Babylufin GOLD, Liberal, Missouri
13 articles 2 photos 229 comments

Favorite Quote:
"'For I know the plans I have for you', declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11. Thank you Lord, for this future you've given me.

That is a very good point: the author decides. Lol.

I definitely will read it! Let me know when it's posted?

 


on Aug. 3 2010 at 11:52 am
MyConstRuctd_IdentiTy SILVER, Chardon, Ohio
7 articles 56 photos 356 comments

Favorite Quote:
"One heartbeat."

"Our scars remind us of where we've been; they don't dictate where we're going."
-SSA David Rossi, Criminal Minds

What is with this posting thing? Honestly, for half the posts I have made recently, they are doubled. I didn't even paste it twice this time! :(

on Aug. 3 2010 at 11:50 am
MyConstRuctd_IdentiTy SILVER, Chardon, Ohio
7 articles 56 photos 356 comments

Favorite Quote:
"One heartbeat."

"Our scars remind us of where we've been; they don't dictate where we're going."
-SSA David Rossi, Criminal Minds

No thanks neccesary, because it is a very good piece. :) No prologue can be too long. It's however long the author decide to make it. Sure, most make them shorter, but I have read quite a few long ones. I just submitted the prologue to another story of mine, but at first, I had planned on making it a chapter 1. I decided not to. It's not too long, like two pages on Microsoft, but still, I mean it's 12 font, so there's a lot there. 

 

That's just proof, that not all prologues are short, or all are long. :) And actually, one part of my new story is based on problems between my sister and her bf. It's in the prologue, so when that's approved you can read it. :)

 

One more thing: if the next part is as good as this one was(which I'm sure it will be!), then I'll definitly like and read it!:)

 

Best Regards,

 

--Stitch--


Babylufin GOLD said...
on Aug. 2 2010 at 4:09 pm
Babylufin GOLD, Liberal, Missouri
13 articles 2 photos 229 comments

Favorite Quote:
"'For I know the plans I have for you', declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11. Thank you Lord, for this future you've given me.

Thank you sooo much! :) I'm so happy you liked it!

I think it might be a kind of long prologue, but that IS a good idea... I didn't think of that. Lol. We'll see what happens! Haha.

I believe the part about the two sisters came out subconsciously. I didn't notice until you just pointed it out, but my best friend and her sister recently moved out of their moms house because of problems that are sort of like that, but not quite.

So, thank you sooo much, I'm very happy that you liked it, & I hope the next part you will like just as much! :D Thanks for commenting!

Much appreciation,

Babylufin.


Babylufin GOLD said...
on Aug. 2 2010 at 4:06 pm
Babylufin GOLD, Liberal, Missouri
13 articles 2 photos 229 comments

Favorite Quote:
"'For I know the plans I have for you', declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11. Thank you Lord, for this future you've given me.

Haha, I will do! Thank you! :) I'm so happy you liked it!

on Aug. 2 2010 at 1:28 pm
MyConstRuctd_IdentiTy SILVER, Chardon, Ohio
7 articles 56 photos 356 comments

Favorite Quote:
"One heartbeat."

"Our scars remind us of where we've been; they don't dictate where we're going."
-SSA David Rossi, Criminal Minds

Sorry! About my post bove, I mean. Didn't mean to paste it twice. Just ignore the bottom half of it, then. :)

on Aug. 2 2010 at 1:25 pm
MyConstRuctd_IdentiTy SILVER, Chardon, Ohio
7 articles 56 photos 356 comments

Favorite Quote:
"One heartbeat."

"Our scars remind us of where we've been; they don't dictate where we're going."
-SSA David Rossi, Criminal Minds

Babylufin,

 

Wow. This was fantastic! I never would have come up with this storyline. Well, from what I can tell, you have two options. Leave this as a short story like it is, or continue on with a chapter 2. This would also make a good prologue. So, you could continue on with a chapter 1.

 

Anyway, it was brilliant, and like Makayla1513 said, you did an awesome job at keeping my interest the whole time. One more thing that I found very well written, was the section that told about the sisters, Welfare, and the parents. That part right there, shows that you are very intelligent, and you know what you are doing. It shows also, that you know what you're talking about. Some people just put things down on a piece of paper, just because they think it sounds smart.

 

I really enjoyed this piece, and keep it up, for, trust me, I will be checking out more of your stuff. Keep up the great work.

 

Best Regards and Fellow Critic,

 

--Stitch--


on Aug. 2 2010 at 12:31 pm
CrazyWriter GOLD, Lorton Station, Virginia
16 articles 2 photos 102 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Once you have given up on the most important thing in your life, you begin to die, because then, you gradually lose your true self"~Hana Kimi
"Someone who can lie to themself. . . is lonely, and in pain"~Hana Kimi

Love it!! You have to write more!! :D

Babylufin GOLD said...
on Aug. 1 2010 at 9:36 pm
Babylufin GOLD, Liberal, Missouri
13 articles 2 photos 229 comments

Favorite Quote:
"'For I know the plans I have for you', declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11. Thank you Lord, for this future you've given me.

Aww, thanks!!! I'm glad you enjoyed it! The rest is on it's way soon!!

Babylufin GOLD said...
on Aug. 1 2010 at 9:35 pm
Babylufin GOLD, Liberal, Missouri
13 articles 2 photos 229 comments

Favorite Quote:
"'For I know the plans I have for you', declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11. Thank you Lord, for this future you've given me.

Haha, thanks. :D LOL.

Babylufin GOLD said...
on Aug. 1 2010 at 9:34 pm
Babylufin GOLD, Liberal, Missouri
13 articles 2 photos 229 comments

Favorite Quote:
"'For I know the plans I have for you', declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11. Thank you Lord, for this future you've given me.

Yes, I am posting more...just haven't gotten around to posting it yet! =/ Lol. I hope you'll like/enjoy it!

Memalion said...
on Jul. 31 2010 at 3:25 pm
Memalion, Minneapolis, Minnesota
0 articles 10 photos 41 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Self-control is knowing that you can, but deciding that you won't."

I loved this!! The ending was perfect. I'm waiting for more!

SpiritGirl03 said...
on Jul. 31 2010 at 1:27 am
SpiritGirl03, Webb City, Missouri
0 articles 0 photos 1 comment
What a wonderful story. I was excited to read it. Please continue! :)

a.m.f BRONZE said...
on Jul. 31 2010 at 1:22 am
a.m.f BRONZE, Gainesville, Florida
3 articles 12 photos 97 comments

Favorite Quote:
"God never shuts a door unless he opens another."

You're welcome! Just out of curiosity, are you going to post anymore to it?? Like a second part, or chapter two or something. I'd be interested to see what happens in this story after he's back alive!! :)

Babylufin GOLD said...
on Jul. 31 2010 at 12:35 am
Babylufin GOLD, Liberal, Missouri
13 articles 2 photos 229 comments

Favorite Quote:
"'For I know the plans I have for you', declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11. Thank you Lord, for this future you've given me.

Thank you! :) I'm glad you liked it. I hope you like Part 2 as well!

Babylufin GOLD said...
on Jul. 31 2010 at 12:33 am
Babylufin GOLD, Liberal, Missouri
13 articles 2 photos 229 comments

Favorite Quote:
"'For I know the plans I have for you', declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11. Thank you Lord, for this future you've given me.

Why thank you! That's what I like to hear! I'm so glad you enjoyed it, & it means so much to me. :D

on Jul. 30 2010 at 9:57 pm
taylorf463 GOLD, Marion, Kentucky
13 articles 0 photos 152 comments

Favorite Quote:
If he'll lie for you, he'll lie to you.

An ending was an ending. No matter how many pages of sentences and paragraphs of great stories let up to it, it would always had the last word.

Oh! Nice! You put very good description into characters thoughts and I felt like I was in the mind of the character. Very good and I will soo go and check out more of it. When it gets on here. :)