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Hateful Obsession

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For a moment, I felt as if a part of me had honestly wilted and fell from my body, died and withered away. My heart wouldn't beat, my lungs wouldn't inhale, and my mind wouldn't think. I was left standing there in that ominous, dimly lit space with his words bounceing around my skull.

'I didn't think that you were honestly so dense...'

'You honestly thought I cared about you? Ha. Try easy entertainment...'

Then I remembered the words he had spoken in the past, the words that still clung to my heart desperately, threatening to make it burst within the fragile cage of my ribs.

'I love you Taylor. Please. If you believe anything I ever say, believe me now...'

'I might honestly, be able to spend the rest of my short life with you...'

Tears. Those damned, traitor tears that stung as they welled in the corners of my puffy eyes, threatening to spill over. But, I didn't bother to wipe them away. Because I didn't want to. I wanted him to see exactlly what he was doing to me. Even if I would look weak, atleast he'd know. Atleast he'd realize that he had finally broken me.

That's when my body decided to physically respond. The corners of my mouth curled upwards into a cruel and malicious smirk as my brain finally began to process my thoughts.

Though my heart was screaming in pain, telling me to run, to escape, to leave him behind and go on with my life, it seemed my selfish, insane brain was content with keeping me where I was rooted. These weren't tears of pain, I slowly realized.

They were tears of happiness.

Who cared if he didn't love me? What did it matter that his heart was held for someone else. As long as he was able to tell the lies as perfectly and beautifully as he had before, what did the rest really matter. I felt wanted with him, cared for. Even if these feelings were ultimately spawned form hate and anger, they were still created from some sort of burning passion.

Inhaleing deeply, my lungs finally filling as my heart slowly ceased it's acheing pounding against my chest, my eyes turned upwards to meet the icy blues of his own. So much hate bubbled within him. I could see it. I could physically feel it. He hated me. Hated my very existence, my very being.

Oh well.

Leaning forward, I pushed my frozen, numb body against the pulsateing heat of his own, my hands reaching for the back of his tender neck, my fingers curling in the deep blackness of his scalp. Pressing my lips to his earlobe, I let the venom slip from between my lips in firey sheets, hopeing that each syllable stabbed and burned him with hellfire.

"Abuse me Kevin. Hate me. Because in the end, I absolutely love to hate you..."





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