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The Island Of Dreams
“I feel like I’ll never know who I really am if I’m stuck here, on this stupid island… everybody is so suffocating”
I heard my name echo through the house, naturally I locked the door, dashed to my bed, and I threw a blanket over my head. I heard the pounding of their feet on the worn stairs leading to my room.
The doorknob shook, time seemed to stop, and the hinges busted.
The door gave in and both of them came bolting into the room, they ripped the blanket off of me. They told me that I didn’t deserve to be warm.. He had the usual.. He took his belt off and he whipped me across the face with it.. I fell to my knees and I grabbed my face, I tried not to cry.. But I couldn’t help myself. I burst into tears and within seconds he hit me hard in the temple.. I hit the floor hard and saw my consciousness disappearing.. I bit my tongue hard, I clenched my fists as hard as I could. And then I heard her sick voice… it resonated through the room. “Hit him again.”
Everything went black.
…..why don’t they love me….
….I’m their son……
…..How come they don’t want me?…
….I love you mom & dad…..
The sun was bright, it filled me with warmth, I rose to my feet, I could feel the dried blood. I went to the bathroom and washed my face, my eyes were still bright red from crying earlier today, as I stared into them, it was almost like I could see through myself, no one really cared about me, I was just there…I was just…..empty?
Before my parents realized i was awake, I snuck out through my window, I slid down the gutter and I ran as fast as I could to those woods at the end of the block. I continued in full sprint through the woods until I reached the cliff overlooking the ocean, and I just stood there….And I just stood there.
The sun had gone down, and by now my parents had to have realized I had runaway and had probably called the cops to find me.
I heard sirens in the distance, and I turned back to the pitch black woods, I walked into them.
“I would run away to the city, because it’s a really awesome place. It’s my favorite place to be. There’s lots to do, and lots of really interesting people to meet.”
When I snuck back into the house it was dead silent. I walked up the stairs to my room, and when I walked in, my dad grabbed me by the throat, he was on top of me… I was on the floor, I couldn’t breathe, I acted as fast as I could, I knew that if I didn’t that I would die here today, I swung my arm as hard as I could Into his face. He fell off me and I jumped up as fast as I could, I grabbed the old signed baseball bat off my wall, as I swung to hit him…to make him feel like s***, to show him what it’s like, my mother grabbed my arm, she had a beer bottle in her hand, she hit me hard in the face, I dropped the bat, and I ran.
I ran through the glass door, and I felt the glass spit across my face, the warm blood was more comforting than my parents had ever been. When I finally stopped running , I realized that it was pouring out. The rain was like needles falling through my body, my head was swollen where my mom had hit me with the bottle, and there was still shards of glass stuck in my face, I walked to that cliff again, you know… the same one from the other night. And when I got there I sat under the big , old tree that stood proud over the ocean.
I fell asleep.
……..I won’t ever go back…….
……I’d rather be alone then with you….
…..You’ll miss me terribly…..
….I love you mom & dad…..
A few hours later I made my way to the train station. It was one of those old freight train stations, the ones that carried goods across the country.
I jumped on one, I moved a few boxes around, so that I could lay in between them and keep without being seen, and then I went back to sleep.
“ I would run away to Julia’s house, she’s my friend I met when I was four.”
When I saw that I was finally off the island, I jumped off the train and hit the ground hard, I recovered quickly and began to walk up this long long road… it had to lead somewhere. I was exhausted when I reached a fork in the road… the sign pointing in the direction of where I had come said.
“The Island of Dreams”
The sign pointing the other direction had had the words written on it crossed out, and someone had rudely written.
I looked at both signs, I laughed a little bit, and I continued down the road to nothing special.
It was covered with trees on both sides, but it wasn’t that scary kind of road that you regret taking.. It was peaceful, it was happy, it was weird. And at the end I reached this little town, there were a few people outside, they all lived in these kind of old hut looking houses, and they were all staring at me, I continued to walk through the town, and I reached another sign… this one said.
“The Edge of Happiness”
Once again I laughed a little, and I walked further through the woods, I reached this beautiful looking beach, and I laid down, I really needed to. I could hear the waves, it sounded so nice, the breeze was relieving and before I knew it, I was sleeping.
….. I’m far away from you now…..
…..You’ll never find me……
…..Don’t come looking…..
….I love you mom & dad…..
I woke up and for the first time since I had left I was starving.. I started to think about all the things they had done to me, all those times they hit me, all the times they made me cry… All the terrible thoughts wouldn’t leave me alone, I just couldn’t think of anything else but them… I started looking for my next destination. I looked down the beach, and there was nothing. It went on forever. So I figured if I ever wanted to eat, I had better start walking. I walked for hours and hours, and finally I could see something over the horizon, it was so far away, I picked up speed, and I began running towards whatever it was. And when I finally got there, I felt sort of devastated, it was just another sign. This one also had half the words crossed out. But now it read.
“Humanities Breaking Point”
I laughed again, this time a little bit harder, because these signs just seemed to get more and more ridiculous. I continued walking down the beach and I was getting hungrier. I got to this old, run down building, it was like a warehouse, it was on the beach, half of it was underwater, I walked towards the enormous building, and I reached for the doorknob, someone kicked from the other side, and the door flew open. A kid, covered in rags, came running at me with a broken bottle.
“I would run away to Australia, because no one pays attention to Australia.”
I stepped out of the way, I pushed him to the ground, and I took my belt off, he attempted to hit me again, I swung the belt hard and it hit him across the face, he fell to his knees, I saw the tears flowing from his eyes, and I raised my arm again to finish him off… I had seen this before… last time I was the little kid overpowered so easily by someone bigger and older than me. I dropped the belt, and I ran past the building, as far as I could, there was so many of them.. Little kids I mean, there had to have been at least 15 standing on the roof watching me run further and further up the beach. The beach was finally ending… I could see a forest at the horizon, I just continued running, I finally reached the forest and I hesitated to proceed, I didn’t know what could have possibly been inside… it was almost night time, I laid down in the sand for one more night, and I quickly faded into the world of dreams.
….. Have I been like you all along?….
….. How come you didn’t come looking?….
…..I don’t want to be found……
….I love you mom & dad…..
felt a slight drizzle, the water dripped down my face, it was cold, it was refreshing. I was still really hungry, I had been hoping that sleep would relieve the hunger that had been making it harder and harder to press on. I decided that the woods in front of me was the best chance of finding food. So as hard as it was… I just kept walking, the woods were a lot darker than the beach, and I could hear noises everywhere, one particular noise echoed through the woods, louder than anything else, it sounded like grunting. I walked a little faster.. I reached a clearing , there was a huge tree in the middle, and underneath it was an old man…
He looked helpless… he looked dead…I was surprised when he talked to me… I moved closer to him, keeping his hands in sight, he told me that he wanted to die….
“I would run away to yesterday, because if I’m not happy today, where else can I go?”
I felt something inside me disappear, I started to sweat, I started feeling dizzy, my knees felt as If they were going to break, and then it all went away… and I started to walk again. I just picked a direction and started walking, I found a tree with fruit on it, and I ate as much as I could, it tasted so sweet, it was like heaven to me. After I was full and partially refueled I continued walking forward. It started getting dark out, and so I figured it was almost night time. I attempted to find somewhere to sleep. I found a spot on the ground that was flat, and the wall next to it was covered in vines, and I laid down, and I tried to fall asleep, but I could hear the sounds of possible threats in the distance, after an hour or two, I didn’t care anymore, I was asleep again.
…..”Hit Him Again” she said…..
…. Did I really deserve it?…..
…. I’m sorry I wasn’t good enough…..
….I love you mom & dad…..
The sun was just barely shining through the trees, but it was a lot less scary during the day. The place I had been sleeping was comfortable enough for me to actually sleep, but there was something about it that I didn’t realize, the wall hadn’t been a wall at all…it was another sign.. This time it had all the words been originally written were there, It said.
“The Last Strand of Sanity”
I didn’t laugh this time. I just looked down and kept walking. I reached the edge of the woods, and there was a road in front of me, I started up the road without looking back. The sun was hot on my shoulders, and I couldn’t escape it… the road rolled on forever and ever. And I walked as far as I could, I just kept on walking, I never stopped.
“ I would run away to Rhode Island, Pennsylvania or upstate New York, because property is cheap and you can find work easily.”
I haven’t eaten in 3 days, I haven’t slept for that long either, I don’t know when this road is going to end, it feels like I have been walking forever… I’m so exhausted. I didn’t think it was ever going to end, but then I saw a sign in the distance, I was partially excited.. I started to run to it, when I got to it, I realized that it was very old, and it wasn’t standing anymore, it was broken on one side, and there were a lot of cross outs on the giant piece of metal…. I couldn’t believe what it said…It said.
“The Island of Dreams”
And something else inside of me had broken, I don’t know what it was… but I was completely gone… physically and mentally, I couldn’t take the torment anymore. I was just a kid, how could I possibly deserve this? And as I continued past the sign… it started to drizzle again. And the rain relieved a lot of the exhaustion that had taken over my body. I just kept walking… but I never reached another sign… I never found any food… and I never knew why all those signs had seemed so ridiculous to me….until now.
My body felt weak… I couldn’t do this anymore… I collapsed…. exhaustion drifted away from me… I wasn’t hungry anymore…. I wasn’t sad anymore… I was alone.
…. I couldn’t hold on anymore….
….You never took care of me….
….You never made me happy….
….I hate you mom & dad…..