Check, Check… Biggy Broke It

May 21, 2009
By Anonymous

“What the hell, Biggy?!” Eminem’s eyes were filled with rage as the elevator creaked and the alarm sounded. “It sucks enough I got to miss out on my daughter to record with y’all, but how you gonna’ break the elevator with those mountains you call your stomach?”

“Em’, ain’t none of us want to be here,” Biggy Smalls balled his fists; he seemed to get more and more infuriated with each word. “But if you don’t stop with those fat jokes, I’m going to bust a cap so big in you, people going to pass by you and think they made a placement error with the Grand Canyon.”

“Guess you’d be the authority on big wholes. I mean just look at your humps!”

“Both a y’all, shut the hell up!” Tupac nearly screamed as he rose to his full height, which was bigger than both Em’s and Biggy’s.
When the elevator was silent except for the alarm Tupac continued: “Em’, although what’s coming out your mouth is funny I need to think, so shut up, you can make ‘BS’ feel as bad as you want when we’re off; and ‘BS’ just shut it altogether. You’re lucky I wasn’t strapping when we came in the studio.”
No one spoke for about a minute; Eminem kept a watchful eye on both of his fellow elevator-captives, and a listening ear to the door. After about a half an hour, Biggy became suddenly claustrophobic, and quickly stood to repeatedly bang on the elevator door; all the while, he screamed, “Let me the hell out of here!”
As Eminem and Tupac started to each develop a headache from Biggy’s screaming and banging, they made a silent agreement to beat him senseless; and as they were about to follow through on that plan, his hand accidently tapped the “DOOR OPEN” button, and the doors shot open. For a moment they stared at each other, but after no more than five seconds, they ran from the building faster than the door had swung open, not even questioning why the door had opened.

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This article has 2 comments.

Zak De Stael said...
on Jun. 16 2010 at 3:02 am
Zak De Stael, Hartland, Wisconsin
0 articles 0 photos 3 comments
Actually it was just an article for school. In reply to your question, they were just too stupid to call for help.

on Apr. 11 2010 at 8:02 pm
samanthab1996 BRONZE, Kansas City, Missouri
4 articles 0 photos 15 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." -Phillipians 4:13

lol!! This was pretty funny, and kind of creepy :) Had they really been stuck, or were they just too incompitent to try the button? Or were they really locked in there, and mysteriously the doors opened? Very interesting! Keep up the good work!! :)

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