April 16, 2009
By Amanda Gonzalez BRONZE, Bronx, New York
Amanda Gonzalez BRONZE, Bronx, New York
3 articles 0 photos 0 comments

Desiree was desolate as she mounted the dimly lit staircase in the building, but that didn't stop her, she was in a vengeful state of mind. So she continued climbing up one step at a time, trying to be careful to not make a sound. She tip-toed past the large beast looking security guard as he napped. Carefully, she removed the keys off his desk. She couldn't help thinking that she could go to jail for this haphazard decision. There was no stopping now, she had to catch the pilferer who ruined her name. This thief had a blatant disregard for what he was doing to her. As she got to the top floor, she meticulously placed a trap for the thief, knowing he couldn't resist it. She groped through her bag looking for her video camera. She place the camera in view of the jewels. She finished setting up the camera and hid behind a huge chair in the hall. As she suspected the thief came at the exact time he always came. But to her surprise the thief wasn't a guy at all, it was her amiable best friend Liyah. She jumped out from behind the chair and said, “ Aha, I've caught you now!” “Huh, what are you talking about?” said Liyah. “You know exactly what I'm talking about, you've been stealing all the jewels and money from inside this building and you have been blaming me for the crimes!” said Desiree. “So you've finally caught on, you know realize you can't have everything, Dee!” said Liyah. “I can't believe it! I always thought you were my best friend but, I guess I was wrong to have any friends.” said Desiree. Liyah slowly walks away from the jewels and pulls out a .9 mm gun and points it toward Desiree. “I may have blamed you for all the wrong I've done but it was all worth it, just so I could see the blood spilling out of your head” said Liyah. “You wouldn't kill me with a security guard right downstairs” said Desiree. “He's ten floors below us, I highly doubt he'll hear you screaming or the bullet leaving the gun” said Liyah. “You have some nerve to be in this position, I've been nothing but kind to your sorry self, I was your only friend in this school. Everyone thought you were just a weird girl who sat alone and talked to herself, and now you have the nerve to pull a gun out on me?” said Desiree. “You make me laugh Dee, don't try to make this about me” said Liyah. “This has always been about you, your a psychopath with more issues than one! Your taking your anger out on me but I know I'm not the one you want revenge on!” said Desiree.” You think you know who I am but you have no idea” said Liyah. “Whatever you say Liyah, but we both know your not crazy enough to pull the trigger, are you?” asked Desiree. “I just might be” said Liyah. Liyah pulls the trigger and it hit Desiree right in the chest killing her instantly, Liyah laughs in her face and said, “ I guess I was crazy enough to kill you and get away with it”. Liyah snatched the jewels off the table and walked away. Hours later the police officers found Desiree's cold, lifeless body on the ground. They search the room for clues, anything leading to her murder. They find the most important clue. The video camera Desiree set had recorded the whole conversation between Desiree and her killer. After watching the video, the police go looking for Liyah, but it was to late. She was shot dead by Desiree's boyfriend, Joshua. He confessed to the police that he killed Liyah because she killed his girlfriend and his unborn child. His exact words were, “I'm proud to say that I killed her in cold blood” and he laughed.

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This article has 1 comment.

on Feb. 3 2010 at 4:50 pm
erinzombie BRONZE, Dunbartonshire, Other
1 article 0 photos 13 comments

Favorite Quote:
"The cure for death itself. The answer is immortality. By creating a legacy, by living a life worth remembering, you become immortal. "

You should split your work up into paragraphs. When it's all in a block like that it puts people off from reading it, it looks a bit daunting.


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