August 11, 2016
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I sit on my log, lurking in the leaves. I'm starving, but I must be patient. I will never get food unless I lay perfectly still in the jungle undergrowth. All I hear are the endless drones of the insects and the loud chirps and squawks of the jungle birds. All are simply local pests, not large enough to satisfy my hunger. From afar, I hear a strange, new noise, similar to the incessant ruckus of the birds, but lower. I concentrate on the noise. Could this be my lunch? The sound comes closer and closer. I hear the leaves and branches rustle. A flock of strange creatures emerges from the brush. If I could laugh, I would have! These hideous creatures look like enormous beakless birds whose feathers have been plucked entirely off except for a small patch on top of their oblong heads! If I play my cards right, I could feast on these giants for the rest of my life! Careful not to be noticed, I launch myself through the air, landing on the lumpy back of one of these creatures. I sink my fangs in, expecting to taste the soft flesh of these new creatures, and immediately pull back in surprise. That was not flesh! It tasted firm and artificial, like nothing I had ever tasted before. This must be their exoskeleton! I must wait until this creature is separated from the flock until I can catch it off guard and feast.

I don't have to wait long before the creature decides to rest. It positions its body horizontal to the ground and closes its eyes. I wait for its breathing to slow before I creep towards it. If I am seen, I am dead. I tentatively place a leg on top of a pink limb. This looks promising. I sink my fangs in and taste the salty sweet blood.

A while later, the rest of the flock notices my handiwork. They squawk and squawk. A while later the flock picks up my feast and move it to a strange shape made of trees. The nerve of them! Who steals somebody else's meal? That's just plain rude. I must find my way back to it. I concoct a plan. As soon as the flock leaves, I scale the side of the square tree contraption and crawl inside. Finally I am reunited with my meal. I will eat well for quite a while. I go explore my buffet for a while. Suddenly I feel the contraption lurch. What is happening? I crawl up the side and try to find a way to escape. There is none. I am trapped with my feast.

The contraption lurches and lurches for what seems like forever... until finally it stops. The contraption opens and another one of those creatures looms over the side. I have had enough of these creatures! They are delicious to eat, but are a pain in the spinnerets to deal with. I'd rather just eat lots of birds than have to deal with these creatures again. I sneak out the side of the tree-box and run to the open air. Once I get outside, however, I notice a huge difference. Where have all the trees gone? Where are the familiar insects and birds and underbrush? Have they all been eaten by some other creature? Or have I been transported to a faraway land? I assume it's the latter when I see a small, unfamiliar insect waddle past me. I suppose I must learn to survive here now. I have no idea how to get home. I begin to wander around, trying to learn the layout of my new home. Suddenly, a medium-sized black bird swoops out of nowhere and snatches me up. For the second time today I find myself hurtling through the air! I am too stunned to bite it immediately. The insolence of this bird! Does it not realize who I am? I am the king of the jungle! I feast on birds! Who does this bird think it is! This bird plans to eat me. Me! I sink my fangs into its leg. The bird lets out one last angry squawk and begins to descend at an alarming rate. This was poorly thought out by both the bird and me.

I land in a grove of small, strange trees. Too full to feast on the bird, I crawl toward a large red shelter. Inside the shelter, it is dark and musty. It is a good place to set up a home. I get to work building a web.

Later on, while resting in my web, I notice a female spider. I am caught off guard by how beautiful she is! Small and slender, she catches my eyes. She crawls toward me, and I crawl towards her.

A while later, our eggs hatch, spilling out hundreds of tiny babies. I cannot believe that I am a father to such a lovely set of spiderlings! As I watch them disperse into the wide world, I feel a sense of pride. I have never been so glad that those creatures trapped me in that contraption.

One day, one of my sons comes home, and informs me that he found a place damper and murkier than the barn! My queen and I immediately decide to move the family there. My son leads the way as we traipse across the fields to our new home. To celebrate, my queen and I lay some new eggs.

Everything is working out terrifically for my family and me. We are prospering in this new land. Suddenly, while enjoying an evening meal of birds with my lovely queen, one of those hideous creatures crashes through the roof of my new home! My queen charges at the creature, defending herself, but the creature puts up a mean fight. The two battle for what seems like an eternity. I do not interfere. My queen is the most powerful queen of the world. There is no being more powerful than my queen, my babies, or myself. Suddenly, the creature makes its move and catches my queen off guard. I watch in horror as my queen is flung screaming  through the air. She smashes into the wall and bursts into flame. No! My beautiful queen, the love of my life, has been bested by this frail creature, king of nothing. I charge at him, determined to avenge my queen. There are flames all around, the same flames that squelched my queen's flame of life. I assume that the creature will be afraid of the flame, as most animals are, but alas, the creature appears to have power over the flame, much to my dismay. The creature envelops me in flames. I scream in pain, but do not let the flames deter me from my cause. I am the king. I must survive and defeat this creature, for the sake of my poor queen, for the sake of my children, for the sake of my kind. I launch myself at the creature, but before I can land on it and finally be victorious, the creature shoots a sharp talon at me and impales me. The force of the impact sends me hurtling through the air. I notice with horror that I am flying towards my nest, which is full of my children. Helpless, I collide with the nest, which bursts into flames. This, I realize, is the end.

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