A Series of Unfortunate Events-The True Story of A Bad Beginning

July 8, 2011
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If you have ever had a birthday, you would know that getting a present would be the best part of the entire day. Hoping for a brand new set of crayons and coloring book, you would be highly disappointed when you opened up the gift box, and found instead a tomato chopper. This too, is the same exact feeling you will have if you keep on reading the tale of the Baudelaire orphans. Opening up this book, you hope for an amusing story filled with love, and a good ending. This, my dear friend, is not the case. Instead, you are going to find inside this pleasantly wrapped box, how Violet became Mrs. Count Olaf, and how Klaus and Sunny were betrayed by a feline. If I were you, I would take your book and cast it aside, never to touch it again. That is, unless you enjoy great disappointment. Indeed, the three children had not had a good birthday since they had been orphaned, sent to Count Olafs' house, and found out about his scheme to steal their fortune. We find Violet and Count Olaf just finishing the signing of the paper that makes the marriage official. Suddenly, the lights go out. Expecting Count Olaf to escape, the audience, (which includes the children, Justice Strauss, Count Olaf, his henchmen and the banker Mr. Poe) jump up to attack. Instead however, Count Olaf shouts, "Turn the lights back on!" Everyone freezes and looks around. A few seconds later, the room is flooded with light. With a wicked grin, Olaf turns to Klaus and Violet. "So you think you are so clever? Well the law does indeed state that it must be in your own hand. And naturally, you are right-handed. However, I have credible information that you are in fact, ambidextrous." The children's' eyes grow wide, and as Violet starts to object, Count Olaf interrupts and says "Your fifth grade teacher has given me the information that you can use either hand. She gave this information to me in exchange for a well groomed feline, which was definitely worth it, seeing as now Violet, you are my bride." Feline, in this case means a cat who is given to a woman for knowledge that will fulfill evil deeds. With his speech over, Count Olaf faces the crowd, takes a bow, and exclaims, "Now, hit the lights!" Olaf and his theater troupe steal away into the night, taking with them a bride, a stunned bookworm, and a very sad, sad baby.

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Ranea said...
Jan. 7, 2012 at 9:08 pm
i just started readin these books but ive gotta agree you did a wicked job, keep it up
DinoNugget said...
Jul. 18, 2011 at 1:55 pm
I agree with Jade.  Your style matched Snicket's perfectly, and yet made the story your own.  Great job!  Write on.  Maybe look at some of my stuff, as well?
StrangeJade This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jul. 18, 2011 at 12:24 pm
Oh my, I love Lemony Snicket. :) And this is very good, especially for your first shot at fanfic. Bravo! You captured Lemony's style well but didn't simply rehash the old plot. I hope you write more! :)
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