If I Woke Up in Europe...

December 14, 2008
By Jessica Lippe, Central Point, OR

It'd probably all start in England. So here I am, my mom calling me and telling me to get up. "Pardon?" I'd say. "We have muffins for breakfast!" she'd yell. At that point, I'd jump out of bed and run to the kitchen, only to find pieces of bread on the table. "Where are the muffins?" I'd ask. "Right there on the table." My mom would point to the bread. "But those aren't muffins," I'd say. "Those are English muffins." "Duh, we're in England." "Maybe I'll have some Belgian waffles instead." BAM! I’m in Belgium! After that decent breakfast, I'll start to get hungry for lunch. "Boy, am I hungry!" Then I get zapped to Hungary. "Maybe I should have some French Fries and…" Before I could finish my sentence, I'm in France. "Hey!" I'd yell at the sky, "I wasn't finished!" But then I'm in Finland, so I am Finnished. I'd mumble. "I also wanted a hamburger." I find myself in Hamburg, Germany. "Oh well," I'd sigh. "While I'm here I might as well have some German chocolate. Hamburgers have too much grease, anyway." Whoosh! And there I am in Greece. I'd change my mind on the kind of chocolate I want. "So maybe I want Swiss chocolate." But while in Switzerland, I'd find no chocolate. Just cheese. "No cheese, just peas!" Well, I'd get French peas. So for lunch, I'd eat French peas on French bread with French toast on the side. Then I'd get thirsty and sweaty. "Man, I need some ice water." Zonk! I'd get an Iceland surrounded by water. Next, I'd need a snack. "Maybe some Swedish Fish!" Do they even make Swedish Fish in Sweden? 'Cuz while there, I wouldn't even be able to find a regular fish! "Oh well," I'd sigh, "Might as well be rushin' off to dinner anyways." You guessed it! I'd be in Russia. "Hmm... I should have some Spanish rice" Spain! "Or maybe some turkey." Turkey! "No. I want either pizza or spaghetti." and then I'd be in Italy. "Now this is more like it!" After dinner, I'd suddenly be in a new country. I don't know which one it is. All I want is to get back to America. So I ask this one guy on the street where I was at, and if he could help me get home. He'd reply, "There's Norway to getchu home!"

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