What's Love? | Teen Ink

What's Love?

April 28, 2008
By Anonymous

"I can’t take this no more I’m gone"
"Please honey I promise I won’t do this no more I'll stop the drinking and the beating, please just don’t leave me, "he said.

Thoughts started running through my head will he be honest this time will he really stop beating on me will he really stop the drinking? “Okay but baby remember you promise!" I said. I’m a fool I thought maybe if I stop thinking how good it use to be I can get the guts to leave him.

"Happy Valentine’s day I got you some chocolate!” I said. Slap! "Didn’t I tell you I’m on a diet why did you get me this? Do you ever listen to me" he said. "You said you wasn’t going to hit me no more I thought you loved me." I said “I say a lot of things!'' He replied. I ran to the room and he ran after me a couple minutes later he said" babe I’m sorry but its like you don’t even listen to me" "you can’t keep hurting me" I said next thing I knew his fist was swinging at me he misses me the first time but he gets me the second. "I’m sorry" I said as I hit the floor. "Don’t tell me what I can and can’t do" he said “you know I hate that". Trying to get threw with all this stuff I say "your rights I’m sorry I’m hungry can I go get us something to eat tonight honey" “I guess but go fix up your self" he replied. As I was going to the bathroom he stops me and says "baby I don’t mean to hurt you but you can’t keep treating me a kid.”











''I know I won’t do it again". I went in the bathroom and straighten up put on a little make-up to hide the bruises. I grab my coat and the keys then left. finally I’m out that house I thought "is it me, what am I’m doing wrong ,I know I love him and he loves me, maybe I’m trying to make him love me" I said then I got in the car I have to talk to someone not my brother maybe my cousin but I must hurry. I quickly got some food then went straight to my cousin house.
"Hey Holly what you been up two I haven’t seen you and forever" I said when she answer the door. "Hey Tiff what are you doing and when did you start wearing make-up.” I don’t" I said with a cry and my voice. "He won’t stop I don’t understand why" I cried. "Aww Tiff who won’t come in and tell me now" she replied. "I can’t right now I must go its getting late but please Holly meets me at the diner at eight P.M. tomorrow when he’s at work. Then I ran to the car." Wait Tiff “she said but I just kept going.
I pulled up the house and park then walk in the door "hey honey I got hotdogs " "where was you at it don’t take that long " he replied "sorry honey it was so many people there buying valentines gifts and stuff I didn’t realize what time it was". "Oh okay well baby I’m hungry get started and then go look under the bed its a little something for my love ". So after I got done making the hotdogs I made him a plate and then I went to the room. "Where is it again babe” it’s under the bed” he replied. So I look under the bed it was the cutest teddy bear ever and there was a pretty red rose. When I grab them I knew I was weak he does this all the time I was thinking to me. I wish his charm was not so strong I said to myself. "I love it I’m going to put the rose in some water". 'So what are we going to do for tomorrow" I said. "Um I don’t know what you want to do". Well I was thinking that we haven’t seen my parent's in a while and I really miss them" I said. “Sure I guess we could go see them they only live on the other side of the town" "but if you try something slick I’m going to hurt you real bad and plus you wouldn’t want to brake your moms heart would you now" he replied. "what I would never I love you and I know you love me and sometimes I can be a lot to handle and plus my mom loves you" I said hoping he couldn’t tell that I was lying behind my smile. But then something pop into my head I got to meet holly tomorrow. "Oh but tiff I got to work so we will go around two okay" he says. "Sounds good to me" I replied. So after I finally got done eating I went to bed ready like usually thinking he might come in and try get me with his charm but he didn’t to night maybe he was tired I thought but what every the reason was I was happy. I couldn’t wait to tell my mom and them what’s been going on for two years now but then it came to me he said he would hurt me if I told, but my dad would never let that happen, but my dad is old what can he do, I don’t know I’ll sleep on it.
So the next day I was up bright and early cooking getting ready to go see my family "good morning sweetie you seem ready for today" he said. "I am I haven’t seen my family aren't you" I replied "oh yea umm Hun n "he said with a laugh in his voice.” I can tell" I said "well I am about to take a shower" he replied but I just turned back around why do I love him so much I was thinking to myself. "I can give you twenty-five reasons why I really in love "..... His phone was ringing I pick it up before he could here it. “Hey baby I miss you" there was a pause. “Hello ........hello" she hung up but for some reason I couldn’t seem to breath. But at that moment I hated him with power. Something I never felt before I can’t believe I went threw hell for him I mean I loved him and I was willing to change for him. Well I am going to do what I should have done a long time ago. "I feel so much better". "Have you seen my phone” he said. Remembering that it would show the answered call I said "I think in the room" I replied as he went to the room. I erased the call then I put it on the table "oh honey it’s in here “he came back then put it in his pocket." Well I’m going to go get ready". So after I got ready and dress we left it took about fifteen minutes to get there.
"Hey mom I haven’t seen you in along time” "I can’t believe this my baby is home" "and where is my soon to be son-in-law “she replied my mom just loves Taylor that was a problem "hey Suzan you look better than ever “he shouted "your just to kind” "Jim are daughter is here can you believe it" she yelled. I was happy because my father didn’t like Taylor and I knew someone would be on my side. “Hey baby girl we've missed you how have you been” he said "Fine daddy" I replied hoping he could tell I was lying. "Taylor" he said as he look him up in down. "Mr. Jones" Taylor replied with a smile on his face. And just seeing that smile made me love him again but then I remember that voice...from the phone. "Well you’re just in time we just cooked some soul food " "Are you hungry Tiff" my mother said.”Sure, I miss my mother cooking anyways" I replied. "What about you Taylor" she also added “oh no ma I am on a diet “he said. So we went in the house and my mom fixed me a plate like she use to when I was little and that when I remember the good old days when I used to depend on my parents and that’s all I wanted to do again so after we all was done eating and chatting I was helping my mom do the dishes while my father and Taylor talked. "So how’s life with you my mom said "It’s been hard mom” I replied “Its always is baby I remember me and your father “she said as her mind wondered. "So daddy use to hit you to I said with curiosity on my face. She look at me like she never have before "no your daddy never hit me before" "Taylor is hitting on you" she yelled "shhhhhhhh............ Please mom I don’t won’t him to know you know" I replied " Baby I thought I raised you better than that you never let a man hit on you " I love your father but if he ever hit me I’ll send him to his grave, and I don’t mean you should kill Taylor but you don't have take this from him" she said.
"I know mom I thought I was the bad guy for a while, I thought if I just obeyed life would get better for us , but then she called" I said. "Who called" she said anxiously. "I don’t know, but I do know I was hurt. She thought I was him but when I didn’t say nothing she hung up, I loved him and I thought that he loved me. I thought that maybe if I stop making him mad or doing the wrong stuff he would stop the beating but he didn’t. He would get mad at the littlest things, I thought I could take them but after a while the just got worse and worse but I’m threw with his lies and cheats for good. But mom I’m so scared he sad he'll hurt me"

"Oh baby he won’t hurt you I’m here now" she said as she was holding me. As I wipe the tears from my eyes I said "you don’t know him like I do and he will hurt me" "you will hate me for this but I’m not staying here mom I know what I must do and it don’t involve you so could you please keep it a secret and not tell dad and please don’t act any different around him he would know" I also added. "Aww my baby girl is growing up I remember when you needed me now you all grown up well be strong and I’m always here if you need me and I won’t tell your father unless it gets out of control" she replied. "Well let go back outside with the men's" I said. As we went outside we seen them laughing and stuff but you could see the fakeness in my father's smile and eyes its like he knew what Taylor was about, I wish I had sooner. "Hey you guys we all finish in the kitchen" Suzan said. "that’s good because its about time for us to go" Taylor added "yea mom and dad we had a lovely time but Taylor have to got work so we will see yall later" "well okay bye sweetheart" my dad said "and you to Taylor" then he walk in the house. "Well let me walk yall to the car" my mom said. When we got to the car hugged my mom and whisper and her ear" remember what you told me" and walked off. On the way home it was silent. We pull up to the house and parked. "Well I am going to go get dress and go to work ill be home a little late" he said. (Five minutes later)" I’m out don’t wait up for me" he said as he kissed me. As much as I hated him I cherish that kiss because that will be the last time it would happen. Then them words went threw my head "don’t wait up" and from that moment I knew he was going to meet her but who is this her I thought I don’t know who it could be but whoever she is she can have him and more power to her. Then I went to the phone and called my mom "hello mom he left its time I leave while I still can sorry I call u when I get threw packing" I said "tiffany you is not about to let him scare you away you is to smart for all of that I thought I raised you better then that " she replied " your right mom what’s wrong with me I got to fight back " I also added "now do you need me or your father's help you know we always here if you need us " she said "no ma I got to do this on my own and don’t tell dad" I said quickly before she could say something else. I hung up I went to the room to try and find something that could help me and I found his phone. I look up the mysterious person that called early this morning but there was three names listed but only one was a girl. Shaness was her name and there was only one thing to do call her but something in me was scared because right when I was about to pick up the phone it started ringing it was Taylor saying that he left his phone and for me to put it up for him and after that call I wasn’t sure if I still wanted to call her but I was tired of this so I did. I dialed 383-1134 it ranged about three times then she answer "hello " she said "hi my name is tiffany you called my mans phone this morning, yes I was the one who answer his phone, sorry to disturb you but I just wanted to let you know you can have him because I used to love him but then he started beating on me and I finally realize he isn’t worth it" I said with confident in my voice.” he beats on you I am so sorry I don’t want him no more I mean its not going to be long before he try to hit on me to its just his charm is so strong and he is so cute he is suppose to come over in about thirty minutes I will end this but I swear I didn’t realize he had a girl until I called this morning " then an idea hit me why don’t we set him up tell him you want to go to his place and he might take you if he thinks I am going to be sleep and I will for his sake" I said with a serious sound in my voice.

"I like the way you think and this plan just might work, and I am so sorry you don’t need a man like that in your life and I hope you realize that after tonight, but I have to go and get ready for this plan so I call you when we are on are way" she replied. "Well thanks for all your help and don’t worry you don't have to stay if you don’t want to I already pack my things and I am sure he won’t hit me" I said with a lie in my voice. I knew he would because he told me he was I just didn’t want her to be there when he did, I felt stupid. "Okay if that’s what you want. So I knew I didn’t have that much time so I cleaned up and move things around so I’ll know my way good enough to either run or fight back forty-five mins past and I knew she was doing something wrong. I thought to my head why did I trust her I knew she wouldn’t help me she probably sleeping with him right now and as soon as the thought went threw my head the phone rang and I felt stupid. As the second ring rung I got scared I knew I wasn’t quitting but I had to do the right thing. So I went to the bed and played sleep. Then about ten minutes later they showed up and I could hear him telling her that she was to loud and her saying does it matter, is anybody else here and then within a heartbeat she was in here saying "so this is why you never bring me here I thought you loved me I am so sorry ..........." "Its tiffany and its okay he was only my ex-finance" I said with evil in my voice but still letting her know it was part of my plan. "Well I am just going to go and Taylor I never want to speak to ever again" she replied. as she shut the door Taylor grab me and said " your not going anywhere" but what he lease expected happen I snatch away from him and said "you don’t get it I am threw with this you will never hit me again I’m threw being scared of you " "but baby I love you and that other girl isn’t nothing to me I was drunk so left the bar with her " he said she followed me around the house. Then I stopped and said you are such a liar I don’t know why I ever loved you but I know that I don’t no more oh and you can keep your excuse I know you been cheating around remember when you went to take a shower your phone ranged and I answer it and that’s when I found out everything, and I want you to know that you will never find someone that loved you they way I used to oh and if you ever put a hand on me again I’ll kill you" I said with a serious look on my faced but inside of me I never felt better. "You making a big mistake nobody will ever want you, you are just a little push over " he said with a horrible look on his face, and I just smile and said "well that might be but you will never have me" then he walk away as he left I grab his arm and said have a nice life and as I said that I took one last look at the man I once loved. I went to the phone and called my mom” it’s over mom now you can tell dad but first I need you to come get.” I’m so proud of you now that’s how you were raised, I’m on my way. Ten mins went by then she pulled up and as tough as I wanted her to think I was I couldn’t. Tears came down my face like an ocean on a shore and my mom came up to me and said " I know it wasn’t easy but it was worth it and later and your life you will realize that you do deserve better now come on lets get you home.


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