A Dream of Torture…

November 4, 2007
By alina roberts, Fort Gratiot, MI

Racing through the mall frantically and scared, I pause infront of JC Penney. It was then I noticed I was being chased by a classmate from school. I noticed it was a male from his short, blonde hair. I am clueless of who he is and why he is chasing me. I continue to run and I realized he was getting closer. I looked back to see who it was and I started to shake and stumble when I discovered that the one who is chasing me is Kyle Mathews. I try to speed up but fail to. I try to hide in the family bathroom, but I know if he finds me he will do something out of his mind. He is so strong and I know he can and will cause major damage. My legs are getting weaker and weaker. I drop to the floor and just start to cry as every hurting tear hits the tile floor. I just sit there knowing that in any minute, he will find me and break me to pieces. I will not know what to do, but whatever happens, I need to try to overcome him.

A couple minutes passed and I freeze when I hear a heavy breath just get closer and closer. He appears as a shadow walking toward me, but I am too tired to run. I try to crawl away but he corners me so I can't escape. He snatches me by my hair and pulls me to my feet. I knee him and he drops me to the floor. He then recovers and looks at me as if he is going to kill me. I start to ball my eyes out as hard as I can when he raises his hand to hit me. He haults to the sound of my cry and a sign of guilt slides across his face. He then kneels down and realizes what he was going to do. I look at him still crying and a sudden movement makes me cringe. His arms were around me holding tight. He repeatedly said, "I am sorry!"... I can't take it anymore! I push him away and start screaming at him. "You were going to hit me! You were going to f****** hit me! Why!?" I sob some more, creating a small puddle. I don't know what to do now. Should I run? Or Should I stay? My fears go small and my tears dry away. I stop and can't believe what just happend to me. I am hoping this is a dream and I wake up. But I feel my pain. Silence then fills the mall.

Gasping for air, I take long breaths and I want to run far away. I want to leave badly, but I knew it wasn't over. Deep inside, he still felt hate and anger towards me. He didn't care for nothing. I still hadn't found out what I had done wrong. I couldn't stop thinking about it. I drew blanks and drifted away...

...CLONK! The sound of a clap had brought me back to reality. My eyes shot through the mall. I realized he was gone..., hiding. I walked slowly and carefully, knowing he could be anywhere. I searched every corner just trying to find an exit without being seen. Every step felt as if I were walking towards danger. Minutes passed by and I was unsure what to do if he found me. But I knew he would break me down. I then begin to sprint through the wide halls, caring less of spotting him or him spotting me. I'll just run. I think about breaking into a store to fire an alarm for help. But what if he were gone? Would the cops believe me? I still feel his presence lingering upon me, but I do not see him. I am sprinting so fast, I can see nothing but a blur, or maybe I could be passing out again. I felt really dizzy so I sat down on a bench infront of Younkers. I prepare to lay down then the thought of him finding me, crossed my mind. I could not bare the thought of me passed out on a bench and he could be sitting right next to me thinking of a plan to ruin my existance. I found a place to hide. It is completely dark and I can not see a thing. This tells me that I am in a safe place.

An hour passes and I wake up. I do not remember hiding in a bathroom stall!... HE FOUND ME! I stand up and walk out of the stall only to find him peeing. I stop in disbelief. I am empty! I don't know what to do! I try to run out, but he catches me. I am breathing and screaming hard and loud. I try grasping the wall, but there is nothing to grasp onto. He drags me into the handincapped stall. I try to fight my way out, but I am too weak. He threw me on the floor. I am so scared, I start kicking him. I begin blaming God. He hadn't helped me at all. He is probably enjoying my pain. I beg for forgiveness on whatever I have done wrong. Nothing changed. Kyle then rips off his belt and arranges me for a beaten. He is grasping the belt in his right hand with the buckle part hanging. He starts to badger me. Every puncture, every slash and every shed to my body made me cower. Leaving welts and bruises all over. He pauses for a moment, "this is my chance to breathe." Through my pain and suffering, I am asking God to tell my family how much I love them, knowing that they may never know my last words. My body goes numb and I lay still, like prey being overtaken by it's predator... I gave up! He then stopped and walked away in satisfaction, leaving me to die. I don't care no more. I try to crawl to the girls bathroom, only to search through the garbage. I make it. I look for something..., anything to write with and write on. I find a shoebox and broken eye liner. Then I drop to the floor realizing this is my only chance to tell my family how much I miss them and love them.

I don't know what to write without it sounding awkward. As soon as the eyeliner meets the cardboard, it all comes out. I start with a casual greeting and I am off. I get lost in my writing and still have so much to say. My eyeliner is running out and I am on my last sentance. I can feel myself drifting away... "Sincerely-Alley" I then prep myself in a corner and place the cardboard on my lower torso. I preyed to God and faded away.

An echoed scream fades in and fades out. I awake to the brightness of the sun shining on my face through the bathroom window. In the distance, I hear my mother crying for me, telling me to wake! Her scream makes me cower, bringing me back to the time I saw my whole life flash before my eyes. It was a tragedy. I can still see his face. Unplucked eyebrows, 5 o' clock shadow, blue eyes and plum lips. Sweat dripping off his forehead, his white t-shirt filled with sweat stains. I begin to scream and yell, "get away from me!, don't touch me!, GET AWAY!!!" Then I hear something. "... Alley!?...Alley? It's me, Momma." says mom, pouting and whimpering. I open my eyes to her soothing voice and I realize I am safe... I am not alone... I am not dead... I fall to the floor in relief. It's over! God loves me!

The paramedics came and were telling mom to back up. She were to stay away from the crime scene although she now had her footprints in the massive puddles of my blood. They ripped her off me as if they were ripping my life away. I had nothing to live for. My life was over.

The paramedics lifted me on a bed and pushed me to the paramedics bus. There were alot of people standing there, looking at me, talking about me, some were even talking to me. The press were taking pictures of me and I hated it. I am drastically shaking. We now go outside and I completely woke up to the luminescent sun. It made me happy to look at something so bright and smile. A faint odor of pine had breezed by me. I took it all in. The smell of spring comforts me, makes me feel alive, and brand new. Then all these feelings disappeared when I smelt his scent, felt his presence, saw his face. His facial expressins told me he wasn't close to being done with me. He intended on killing me with every muscle in his body. My face grew with fear and I showed him that I was scared. My heart jumped out of my chest and my whole bdy went numb. A strange thing that had never happened to me. My brain filled with things to do, but I did not act upon one of them. I will stay with the paramedics and stay safe. We are now on our way to the hospital and the doctors who are treating me are yelling back and forth at eachother. It is making me so frustrated. They make me think I am going to die. I interrupt them by saying, "give me a pen and a piece of paper." I knew I there was a great chance I was going to die, so I wrote down all that had happened and who did it. I wanted Kyle to pay for what he had done to me and suffer like I did. Everyone should know what pain he has caused me. In the letter, I wrote to my mom, telling her to ask him in person, why he did what he did. Then she is to lay that upon my grave. I don't want to die not knowing what I had done wrong. I handed the note to the paramedic and told her to give it to my mother. She took it and stuck it in her jacket. We finally arrived to the hospital. I do not know the name and I don't really care. I just hope my mother gets my two note and does right by them to take them seriously. I tell the paramedic to give the note to my mom now. She walks over to my mom and I am being brought into the hospital. That was the last time I saw her.

"Hey mom, sorry you have to see me like this and I am sorry I never got to say goodbye. But that is not my fault. I love you so much and I will miss you. Take care of my puppy for me will ya? She loves her ears rubbed. Tell my boyfriend Justin that i am sorry I did'nt get to say goodbye and I am sorry that we didn't get to raise a family of our own. Make sure that all my belongings are donated to charity. I am truley sorry for all the fights we have had in the past, and for all those times I would'nt listen to you, but I would give anything to have that again. I have lied to you many times and I am sorry I couldn't trust you. Sorry I stole your drugs, drank your alcohol. Sorry I stayed out so late, for taking you for granted, for disrespecting you, ordering you around. Sorry for telling you that I hated you. Sorry for all the trouble I got into with the cops, for not keeping my grades up in school. I love you so much regarding all that I had said or done. I cherish every moment and every second we have spent together, because I wouldn't have gotten through them without you by my side. I hope you forgive me. Sincerely-Alley."

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