Memories of A Cursed Teenager

September 29, 2010
By LoveSickenedRebel GOLD, Lubbock, Texas
LoveSickenedRebel GOLD, Lubbock, Texas
12 articles 0 photos 47 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Why does everyone think I need a man? Look if you find a guy who is decent, good with kids and has respect for women, call me." "It is better to have loved, than to have never loved at all."


Dark, cold, wet, alone in a cave far from the ruins of my homeland. Everything thrust away to practically nothing. No one survived. I shall be condemned for all eternity if I live that long.

Curse these powers.

They are a curse, not some heaven sent gift from above. God has cursed me to walk this earth to destroy anything or anyone I come across to. I wish I could rid myself of this inferior curse. Why God?

Why give me the ability to live if all I am made for is to destroy?

What is my true purpose for being?

Have you, God, purposely made a living time bomb?

A Monster?

An exiled man to live his life in pain and misery for all of his days? "Answer me God!!! Why?!?!?!? Why am I truly here? And why have these powers cursed me so?" I screamed out to the darkness of the tree-crowded sky, waiting for my answer, waiting for hope to come as I had all my life. "Do not fret young warrior. Your answer will come to you soon. I promise." a voice said, reminding me that someone was still able to watch over me.

I had lost everything. My friends, family, towns I had lived in- everything dear to me was gone- and all I had left is the clothes on my back, my cursed powers, and my name that my dear mother had given to me eighteen years ago, Aden.


The author's comments:
I was bored in my computer class and got on to write something so I could let some steam off. I also did this as a practice of writing from a man's point of view. Thank for reading and never put done your pencil or pen, no matter what people may tell you.

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This article has 6 comments.


on Oct. 7 2010 at 9:57 pm
LoveSickenedRebel GOLD, Lubbock, Texas
12 articles 0 photos 47 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Why does everyone think I need a man? Look if you find a guy who is decent, good with kids and has respect for women, call me." "It is better to have loved, than to have never loved at all."

I am not really sure if I will continue this story, but I am thinking about it.

on Oct. 4 2010 at 10:25 pm
apocalyptigirl BRONZE, Staunton, Virginia
4 articles 2 photos 285 comments

Favorite Quote:
"DON'T PANIC." ~from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

Is there another part to the story?

on Oct. 4 2010 at 2:47 pm
LoveSickenedRebel GOLD, Lubbock, Texas
12 articles 0 photos 47 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Why does everyone think I need a man? Look if you find a guy who is decent, good with kids and has respect for women, call me." "It is better to have loved, than to have never loved at all."

Thank you. I understand where you are coming from when you told me about the "overdramatic" puncuation in my story. I will definetly take that in account and try to do better next time.

on Oct. 4 2010 at 2:44 pm
LoveSickenedRebel GOLD, Lubbock, Texas
12 articles 0 photos 47 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Why does everyone think I need a man? Look if you find a guy who is decent, good with kids and has respect for women, call me." "It is better to have loved, than to have never loved at all."

Thank you very much for your comment. I will gladly take your words of advice in account.

We-R-3 BRONZE said...
on Oct. 4 2010 at 8:29 am
We-R-3 BRONZE, Orlando, Florida
1 article 0 photos 344 comments

Favorite Quote:
A picture is worth a thousand words, however it takes a real artist to turn words into pictures.

Have you heard about the new Lebron Iphone, you have to set it on vibrate because it doesn't have any rings

You leave the reader wanting more which is great. However I was wondering about the emotion it seems a bit flat, it may be because of the difference of gender between you and your protagonist. I see a lot of potential in this piece even though you wrote it because you were bored. The dialouge is great. I applaud your story

 

If it does not bother you could you The Reaper part 1 please.


on Oct. 3 2010 at 3:59 pm
apocalyptigirl BRONZE, Staunton, Virginia
4 articles 2 photos 285 comments

Favorite Quote:
"DON'T PANIC." ~from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

This is interesting. Now I'm wondering what his powers are. Some things I would change: I'd get rid of the excessive exclamation points and question marks when he's screaming at God. I know he's really upset, but there are more effective ways to show that and I think his words speak for themselves. The punctuation overload makes the tone a little, I don't know, unprofessional or overdramatic, and I can't take him seriously. Also, God's reply should be in another paragraph. Another thing I liked---the ending, where he introduces his name. Original. :) Would you mind reading/rating/commenting on my story "Ilya's Tale, Part 1"? Thank you!




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