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Memories of A Cursed Teenager

Dark, cold, wet, alone in a cave far from the ruins of my homeland. Everything thrust away to practically nothing. No one survived. I shall be condemned for all eternity if I live that long.

Curse these powers.

They are a curse, not some heaven sent gift from above. God has cursed me to walk this earth to destroy anything or anyone I come across to. I wish I could rid myself of this inferior curse. Why God?

Why give me the ability to live if all I am made for is to destroy?

What is my true purpose for being?

Have you, God, purposely made a living time bomb?

A Monster?

An exiled man to live his life in pain and misery for all of his days? "Answer me God!!! Why?!?!?!? Why am I truly here? And why have these powers cursed me so?" I screamed out to the darkness of the tree-crowded sky, waiting for my answer, waiting for hope to come as I had all my life. "Do not fret young warrior. Your answer will come to you soon. I promise." a voice said, reminding me that someone was still able to watch over me.

I had lost everything. My friends, family, towns I had lived in- everything dear to me was gone- and all I had left is the clothes on my back, my cursed powers, and my name that my dear mother had given to me eighteen years ago, Aden.




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This article has 6 comments. Post your own!

Itwasamurder...This teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Oct. 4, 2010 at 8:29 am:

You leave the reader wanting more which is great. However I was wondering about the emotion it seems a bit flat, it may be because of the difference of gender between you and your protagonist. I see a lot of potential in this piece even though you wrote it because you were bored. The dialouge is great. I applaud your story

 

If it does not bother you could you The Reaper part 1 please.

 
LoveSickenedRebel replied...
Oct. 4, 2010 at 2:44 pm :
Thank you very much for your comment. I will gladly take your words of advice in account.
 
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apocalyptigirl said...
Oct. 3, 2010 at 3:59 pm:
This is interesting. Now I'm wondering what his powers are. Some things I would change: I'd get rid of the excessive exclamation points and question marks when he's screaming at God. I know he's really upset, but there are more effective ways to show that and I think his words speak for themselves. The punctuation overload makes the tone a little, I don't know, unprofessional or overdramatic, and I can't take him seriously. Also, God's reply should be in another paragraph. Another thing I liked-... (more »)
 
LoveSickenedRebel replied...
Oct. 4, 2010 at 2:47 pm :
Thank you. I understand where you are coming from when you told me about the "overdramatic" puncuation in my story. I will definetly take that in account and try to do better next time.
 
apocalyptigirl replied...
Oct. 4, 2010 at 10:25 pm :
Is there another part to the story?
 
LoveSickenedRebel replied...
Oct. 7, 2010 at 9:57 pm :
I am not really sure if I will continue this story, but I am thinking about it.
 
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