Easy Going, Kainin

May 21, 2010
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Hale to base, 9515. Escapee on foot.

10-4 Hale. 10-33.


"Keep on driving!" yelled the bank robber, "just keep on going!" The man wore black slacks with a bright yellow T-Shirt. His whole wardrobe was topped with an obnoxious tie-dye ski mask. One hand he held a big bag of money he'd just ripped off the local small town bank. With the other hand he held his nose from the stench of stinky feet coming from a slinky kid sitting right behind him.

"Sir, you're scaring the people," the slinky kid told the robber.

The robber looked over at the kid, "And what is your name?" he asked in a sly creepy voice that was enough to make a baby cry.

"Teddy," he replied, wincing away like the robber had threatened to punch him in the face.

"Teddy, the only way I'll calm down is when the cops stop chasing me. And I don't think that is going to happen anytime soon is it?" the robber asked with a gruff huff.

"Uh, no?"

In back of the bus was another young man. This man was finely built and very tall. "The only way the cops are ganna stop chasin' you is if you hand over the money." He looked up from the daily newsprint he'd been reading.

The robber turned around, astonished. "Who are you to tell me what to do!" he bellowed under the sharp crack of a whip his voice let out.

"My name is none of your business. What your business is is giving back the money and then getting a job so you don't have to go out and rob banks," the man said.

"What is your name?" he whined. "Tell me your name!"

"Alright, don’t give yourself a conniption," he said, "Kainin."

The robber laughed, "What kind of name is that?" He was laughing hard, tears fell from his eyes.

Kainin sat there taking in the laughter, "And yours?"

The robber was laughing so much that it interfered with his thinking, "Andrew Fellmonn," he answered, still laughing. Kainin smiled with a glorious grin on his face.

Hale to base, 10-13.

10-4 Hale. Helps on the way.

Sirens and red and blue flashing lights began to follow the bus. "Keep on going," Andrew said through tears and laughter, "take a right at the next intersection then an immediate left." The bus driver did he was told and turned right then immediately left. The sirens and lights went flashing past them going fifty in a twenty-five. "Alright, I'm good now. But you've seriously got to changed that name of yours," Andrew walked to the front of the bus to the over-weight driver, who was shaking with fear, "You, Sir, open the door." Then he turned to the people, mainly talking to Kainin, "No one follow me. I promise you won’t like what happens." He'd clearly forgotten that he'd given away his name. Andrew flew down the stairs of the bus and left the area without any attention.

Soon the police found the parked bus and boarded it. "I am Officer O'Connor," he was then followed by a taller man, "this is Officer Hale. Do any of you know where the bank robber went?" The two men stood there staring at the bus full of motionless people.

"I don't know where he went, but I know his name," Kainin said, pushing his way through the people.

"His name?" the smaller one asked.

"Andrew Fellmonn."

The two officers stood their looking puzzled at each other, "And how did you come by his name?"

"I kept calm."

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This article has 2 comments. Post your own now!

Imaginedangerous This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
May 22, 2010 at 9:33 am
It made me smile. Good job.
Vanna B. replied...
Jun. 1, 2010 at 3:28 pm
thank you, i really enjoyed writing this peice.
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