Vampires Suck | Teen Ink

Vampires Suck

February 1, 2012
By ChevyPillow PLATINUM, Fairfield, Connecticut
ChevyPillow PLATINUM, Fairfield, Connecticut
43 articles 0 photos 1 comment

Favorite Quote:
"I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick @ss...and i'm all out of bubblegum." (They Live 1988)


1 out of 5

Not sure what made me want to see this. Maybe it was the fact that the movie makes fun of Twighlight....or maybe I just wanted to bash on it.

Where shall I start? Nothing in 'Vampires Suck' makes any sense at all. Actually Movies don't always even need to make sense if they've got a solid script. If completely random things are happening in a comedy, but at the same time the jokes are cleaver, well written, and the script is good, the movie can come out pretty well. Here's some examples: Spaceballs, Blazing Saddles, Animal House, Caddyshack, The Blues Brothers, Anchorman, Monty Python and the Holy Grail... The list goes on forever. But when the jokes are unclever, unfunny, forgettable, lazy, has nothing to back it up, stupid, and just plain boring you really need to consider throwing this sick piece of crap in the trash!!

I'm going to be EXTEREMELY generous and give this film one star instead of half a star (in other terms 0.5/5) because I didn't really feel like I wanted to chuck something at the screen, like those really bad straight-to-DVD late night movies you find on Netflix streaming do, but this really deserves no more than one star.


Similar Articles

JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 1 comment.


on Feb. 18 2012 at 9:08 pm
DreamChaser28 SILVER, San Mateo, California
5 articles 2 photos 17 comments

Favorite Quote:
Love is louder than the pressure to be perfect.

Thanks for your insight. I was thinking about watching this movie but not sure if I will now.