Dark Night

May 17, 2013
By Mr.packerbear12 SILVER, Minnesota Lake, Minnesota
Mr.packerbear12 SILVER, Minnesota Lake, Minnesota
5 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Judge lest not you be judged"

"Take the plank out of your own eye before the speck out of your brother's"

"live each day as if it's your last"

"God doesn't give you what you can handle, He helps you handle what you are given"


It was that dark night long ago,
when all creatures where about--
all singing in a loud shout!
while the wind rocked the bow--
and tumbled like balls in bingo,
and among the people came a great fear of doubt,
but now it is time to say lights out.
just like that time in Mexico.

I begun to worry--
and tried to stay calm--
but it was to late to tell my mother sorry;
cause I was about to be embalmed.
the air was full of furry--
as I became a memory.


The author's comments:
I'm not a dark person by any means.

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This article has 26 comments.


on Feb. 18 2015 at 12:14 am
Mr.packerbear12 SILVER, Minnesota Lake, Minnesota
5 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Judge lest not you be judged"

"Take the plank out of your own eye before the speck out of your brother's"

"live each day as if it's your last"

"God doesn't give you what you can handle, He helps you handle what you are given"

Thank you!

on Oct. 8 2014 at 5:01 pm
Trin_Freckles GOLD, Troutman, North Carolina
11 articles 12 photos 27 comments

Favorite Quote:
When your sad, stop being sad and be awesome instead

I wish I could write as well as you. This is really good :) 

on Sep. 5 2014 at 12:35 pm
Mr.packerbear12 SILVER, Minnesota Lake, Minnesota
5 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Judge lest not you be judged"

"Take the plank out of your own eye before the speck out of your brother's"

"live each day as if it's your last"

"God doesn't give you what you can handle, He helps you handle what you are given"

thanks:)               

on Sep. 5 2014 at 12:34 pm
Mr.packerbear12 SILVER, Minnesota Lake, Minnesota
5 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Judge lest not you be judged"

"Take the plank out of your own eye before the speck out of your brother's"

"live each day as if it's your last"

"God doesn't give you what you can handle, He helps you handle what you are given"

thank you              

on Sep. 5 2014 at 12:33 pm
Mr.packerbear12 SILVER, Minnesota Lake, Minnesota
5 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Judge lest not you be judged"

"Take the plank out of your own eye before the speck out of your brother's"

"live each day as if it's your last"

"God doesn't give you what you can handle, He helps you handle what you are given"

thanks:)          

on Sep. 5 2014 at 12:32 pm
Mr.packerbear12 SILVER, Minnesota Lake, Minnesota
5 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Judge lest not you be judged"

"Take the plank out of your own eye before the speck out of your brother's"

"live each day as if it's your last"

"God doesn't give you what you can handle, He helps you handle what you are given"

great feedback, thank you

on Sep. 5 2014 at 12:31 pm
Mr.packerbear12 SILVER, Minnesota Lake, Minnesota
5 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Judge lest not you be judged"

"Take the plank out of your own eye before the speck out of your brother's"

"live each day as if it's your last"

"God doesn't give you what you can handle, He helps you handle what you are given"

That's cool it made that impression on you!

on Sep. 5 2014 at 12:29 pm
Mr.packerbear12 SILVER, Minnesota Lake, Minnesota
5 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Judge lest not you be judged"

"Take the plank out of your own eye before the speck out of your brother's"

"live each day as if it's your last"

"God doesn't give you what you can handle, He helps you handle what you are given"

Thanks!:) That's awesome! Hard to find someone with the same tastes in books!

Longlegs GOLD said...
on Aug. 11 2014 at 2:03 pm
Longlegs GOLD, Greeneville, Tennessee
16 articles 0 photos 84 comments
This is awesome! It has perfect rhythm and even rhymes. Definitely a five star! By the way, I checked out your profile. We have the same favorite books :).

HudaZav SILVER said...
on Apr. 20 2014 at 5:56 pm
HudaZav SILVER, Toronto, Other
8 articles 6 photos 392 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Nothing is impossible; the word itself says 'I'm possible'!" -Audrey Hepburn

Love this poem and the rhythm used in it. Very detailed and the last line was a good closing. Nice job!!

on Mar. 16 2014 at 11:18 am
Kestrel135 PLATINUM, Waterford, Connecticut
43 articles 0 photos 256 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Respect existence or expect resistance"

This is a great poem. The rhythm was very smooth, and paragraphing allowed it to emphasize the most important phrases. The end is the most shocking, yet the most wistful as well, since you realize that they had died. The line 'but it was too late to tell my mother sorry;' was used well and caught my attention. It really doesn't seem shockingly dark, rather the wistful tale of someone being lost and fading into the past. On a whole, very well written and configured. Keep up the good work! 

on Feb. 28 2014 at 9:31 pm
IndigoElisabeth SILVER, Woodbury, New Jersey
5 articles 1 photo 171 comments

Favorite Quote:
John 1:1

lol just saw this :P

on Feb. 28 2014 at 9:30 pm
IndigoElisabeth SILVER, Woodbury, New Jersey
5 articles 1 photo 171 comments

Favorite Quote:
John 1:1

Lol just saw this :P

on Feb. 25 2014 at 9:12 am
thenaturalmystic PLATINUM, Tomah, Wisconsin
29 articles 1 photo 11 comments

Favorite Quote:
"thunder only happens when its raining players only love you when they're playing"
(STEVIE NICKS)

this is awesome love the peice !

on Feb. 13 2014 at 11:22 pm
TheMaskedPoet SILVER, Temple, Georgia
9 articles 0 photos 51 comments

Favorite Quote:
"I wish I could be a little less dramatic, like a Kennedy when Camelot went down in Flames." -Miranda Lambert

It's like pretty awesome.

on Feb. 13 2014 at 6:22 pm
j.g.poems PLATINUM, Naples, Florida
29 articles 6 photos 43 comments
This poem litterally made me say "woah". Very different.

on Feb. 6 2014 at 11:29 pm
Mr.packerbear12 SILVER, Minnesota Lake, Minnesota
5 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Judge lest not you be judged"

"Take the plank out of your own eye before the speck out of your brother's"

"live each day as if it's your last"

"God doesn't give you what you can handle, He helps you handle what you are given"

Thanks Artgirl!:) Been missing you in the forums, please come back:) *cute puppy eyes*

on Feb. 6 2014 at 11:27 pm
Mr.packerbear12 SILVER, Minnesota Lake, Minnesota
5 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Judge lest not you be judged"

"Take the plank out of your own eye before the speck out of your brother's"

"live each day as if it's your last"

"God doesn't give you what you can handle, He helps you handle what you are given"

Thanks!:) 10 charcters

on Feb. 6 2014 at 11:26 pm
Mr.packerbear12 SILVER, Minnesota Lake, Minnesota
5 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Judge lest not you be judged"

"Take the plank out of your own eye before the speck out of your brother's"

"live each day as if it's your last"

"God doesn't give you what you can handle, He helps you handle what you are given"

Thank you:) Yes, I made a few silly mistakes, and I shouod've elaborated nore, but I had to stuck with a certain style for my school project. Also, now that you said to captilize at the beginning of each line I ha e been doing that in my workwork now:)

on Feb. 6 2014 at 11:23 pm
Mr.packerbear12 SILVER, Minnesota Lake, Minnesota
5 articles 0 photos 105 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Judge lest not you be judged"

"Take the plank out of your own eye before the speck out of your brother's"

"live each day as if it's your last"

"God doesn't give you what you can handle, He helps you handle what you are given"

Thank you for the comment:) I was having trouble with rhyming there, amd that was one of my first poem so it was tough, now it's easier for me to rhyme.




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