"Untwined"

April 26, 2010
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The silver lining flakes away,
Leaving only memories behind.
A golden shadow of what used to be
Since now our destinies have untwined.
I'm not on the path you are taking,
And I can't see you there on mine.
The clock, it seems, has stopped for us
With a time we can no longer find.
The rose you gave now stands wilted.
Only a glimpse of a brighter time.
A harbored love that leaves us wanting
To find a bloom of another kind.
The letters you sent are yellow, aging.
Your name fading from where you signed.
Only echoes are now remaining
Of the heart there you once claimed was mine.





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dreamer_believer said...
May 17, 2010 at 10:12 am
wow, this is absolutely brilliant! :) very beautiful. it has such great rhythm...it feels like a song one would find on a movie such as the notebook :) haha. but really this is great, i love the line" the clock it seems has stopped for us, with atime we can no longer find." absolute genius right there :) 5 stars :) would you mind commenting on some of my work?
 
Meru21 replied...
May 17, 2010 at 11:47 pm
Wow. Thank you. The best work comes out of me right before I fall asleep. The problem is getting up to write it down. lol. And I'll definitely check you out. Some of my new stuff just went up, too, so be sure to give it a look. I love criticism. ^^
 
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