The darkness seems to suit me for the time being

April 3, 2018
By vermilion BRONZE, New Haven, Connecticut
vermilion BRONZE, New Haven, Connecticut
1 article 0 photos 0 comments

With a pen and paper I start to let all these feelings out,

Feeling like everything That do is just to end the doubt,

Acting like I’m hard but I don’t know if it’s true tho,

This girl seeing through me if she understands it who knows?

Ive been keeping everything,

Music is a medicine,

But the taste is bitter I Don’t know if I can let it in,

Every time I think of you my mind goes into critical

And I’m just going crazy tryna

Find a way to get to you,

Tryna keep it all together

But this life is killing me,

Maybe if I leave today then they’ll come out to visit me,

I don’t really care enough At least that’s what they’re telling me,

And one day ima have to leave I wonder what they all will see


walking along, walking alone, walking this road, where no one knows me

Hold me

And, tell me something that I don’t know


You know that you’re worth everything,

Calm me down, my sedative,

free my mind from all the dark inside me

Just don’t let me live,

Tired of the feeling that,

I feel like all my s*** is whack,

I feel like all I do is trash,

I ask myself to double back,

if I was to go down today, would you be there to save me?

If I wasn’t the man I am would you still call me baby?

I was scared to loose you But Was to fraid to admit it

Try to get back with you even though I know that you ain’t with  it.

the pain is taking over me,

I wanna know what you will see,

Excuse me miss I have to leave,

My thoughts are taking over me,

Maybe this is best,

Ya know,

not having to think of it,

I don’t really know how to Deal with the things I’m dealing with,

I just know that I don’t wanna leave this earth with nothing done

There’s nothing wrong with wanting them to come and see me when I’m gone,

Crazy the way he made me

Theses page have to hate me

The way that I be writing down feelings that I’ve been feeling lately,

Darkness over takes me And my mind just starts to flood again,

Gotta write this all down can somebody go and grab a pen,


I don’t really wanna leave,

I Just miss your touch,

Whenever you’re around me i just feel that I don’t think as much,

I feel as if It’s all ok,

You start to take the pain away,

I’m running from my self again,

I guess I’m running from the

simple fact that I’m imperfect

Wonder if this s*** is worth it

Wonder if I’ll ever be ok, the kinds of things I have to say

To make sure i don’t loose it

I just sit back in my chair and start to listen to my music

Fall asleep as I go through the crazy thoughts that start to around me

voices start to take over my mind as I start feeling drowsy

now the darkness truly feels as if it suits me

for the time being at least 


walking along, walking alone, walking this road, where no one knows me

Hold me

And, tell me something that I don’t know

The author's comments:

I wanted to write something that not only expresses the way my mind thinks, but also, expresses how much they mean to me, how much i love them. 

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