This is all too much to bear.
Look around and nobody cares.
Try to fight the habitual tears
Threatening to expose your deepest fears.
Admit it once and you lose your mind.
Try to take it back but you’ve started to shine.
Realize their interest was a passing fad.
How can you be both depressed and glad?

Try to breathe but the heaving won’t stop.
In the dark it’s so easy to fade away.
10 PM and you can’t sleep once more.
Afraid they’ll come and end your life for sure.

You try to write out your thoughts but they multiply.
They paint themselves all over your mind.
It hurts to feel like crying from the pain.
But there’s no proof so you hide it in the rain.
Darkness has become such a friend.
You always find comfort in its knowing hand.
Pretending that life is normal.
But secrets are harder to keep when they double.

You question everything you hear.
You deny that you’ve any fear.
You lash out at yourself because you think that you’re wrong.
You laugh at the world because it doesn’t know it all.
You cry because it helps you fall asleep.
You hurt because life isn’t worth the beep.

You hide in the corner.
They try to devour you.
You break away for a moment,
But they find and scour you.
You beg for forgiveness
Then beg for a leave.
They laugh in your face:
Your number one pet peeve.
You search for an answer.
They keep it out of your reach.
You break and tell the world.
They take it all away forever.
You wake up from that nightmare.
But they’re still there.