Pool Of Happiness And Disappointment

August 3, 2011
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If I wrote out and apology,
It would be so hard to believe me.
After all, I'm not an honest person.
Lied when I promised no more,
Messed up, boy am I insecure.
I'll admit you're the best I've had,
And you know I can never remain mad.
You gotta give me credit as a host,
I'm reliable when you need me most.
But I've done wrong one too many times,
And I've already broken barrier lines.
Turning back would make things worse,
I only meant to put you first.
My mistakes weren't accidents,
I knew exactly what I was doing.
Aggravated you to the point,
Where it broke our joint.
Packed all your things, not a tear in your eye,
Left without a so long goodbye.
Words aren't suppose to hurt,
Then again neither is silence.
Both are bringing me down,
To an all time low on the ground.
I'll release the truth,
I owe you a lot that's overdue.
You've made me proud,
You've made me cry.
Along with words aloud,
You forgot goodbye.
You've made me excited,
You made me depressed.
Listened to the phrases you've said,
Some things can't be expressed.
But if you returned for a second,
I'd break down begging for a another chance.
Sincerity was your best quality,
One of a kind you see.
My shadow follows me around,
Taunting me with your voice, while wearing your gown.
Regret draws me close,
Punishes me with an overdose.
Did you ever call me a bad person?
And if you were wondering I found a reason.
My actions were based of the pain I bottled up inside,
And the emotions I've tried to cover up and hide.
If you noticed, I was always your second love.
A puppet under your command,
Not free willed to even stand.
Months seemed like years,
Managed to get by with a few tears.
In the beginning you were my happiness,
By the end you were my disappointment.
I'd erase it all if possible,
I'm not that capable.
The feelings were real.
Everything I've said and felt about you,
I just want to prove my love is true.
I'll release the truth,
I owe you a lot that's overdue.
You've made me proud,
You've made me cry.
Along with words aloud,
You forgot goodbye.
You've made me excited,
You made me depressed.
Listened to the phrases you've said,
Some things can't be expressed.
But if you returned for a second,
I'd break down begging for a another chance.
I know that's not happening,
Because you're not coming back.
What have I become?
No way to undo what I've done.
I have but only one option left.
I'll release the truth,
I owe you a lot that's overdue.
You've made me proud,
You've made me cry.
Along with words aloud,
You forgot goodbye.
You've made me excited,
You made me depressed.
Listened to the phrases you've said,
Some things can't be expressed.
But if you returned for a second,
I'd break down begging for a another chance.
If I wrote out and apology,
Would you believe me?





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