Cut The Valentine

March 6, 2010
By Pitiful_Anonymous PLATINUM, New Cumberland, West Virginia
Pitiful_Anonymous PLATINUM, New Cumberland, West Virginia
22 articles 0 photos 75 comments

Favorite Quote:
"and all you f***ers go beep beep beep in cheap,plastic cars. If It's to dumb to see or say you'll still sing it, and I'll just cue the applause" - Marilyn Manson


It's 5 o-clock on the day of V,
here lies, you and me.
You climb on top of me, to tell me,...
You don't love me, anymore.

I don't know what to say.
You told me once i was just right.
When i heard you say that, the cold black heart turned white.
I put you into me, and now oyu must leave.

I could be the boy you want,
Or the girl you need.
It don't matter babe, as long as your pleased....

Before i cut, cut, cut you out of me.

There you go, out into the snow.
It's a great big white world.
Now i get out the bag, the straw, the knife.
That's when i turn out the light.

Just before i cut, cut, cut you out of me.

I don't cry, there's blood all over me
I might die, there's blood all over me.
Long and wide, there's blood all over me.

After i cut,cut,cut,cut you out of me.. on the last day of V
for you, and me "baby"


The author's comments:
Pretty self explaining. I was told on valentines day i wasn't loved anymore... and it hurt, almost as if they were cutting themselves out of me.

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This article has 7 comments.


on Jul. 30 2010 at 10:34 am
HeatherBee BRONZE, I Live In, Texas
1 article 0 photos 1985 comments

Favorite Quote:
Go on and try to tear me down. I will be rising from the ground, like a skyscraper

Love is louder than the pressure to be perfect

aww :( This was really really reallly really really good tho.....i honestly dont kno wat else to say, i just really liked this poem. lol GOOD job!

on Jul. 2 2010 at 3:37 pm
respecturself7 SILVER, Medina, New York
8 articles 0 photos 76 comments

Favorite Quote:
There is a natural law in life to settle.....I broke that law ~Katherine Hepburn
Love, Is the severest of mental diseases~U.K.
Spinning always spinning....when life puts me down I'll give you a call~respecturself7

lol very bitter. Who wouldn't be? A lot of ur poems sound like a dark song but there's a hit of something else....

on Jun. 27 2010 at 9:09 pm

simon cowell feedback--you asked for it!

After glancing at all your poems, this one looked the most interesting to me. I have trouble relating to what it's like to fall in love with a guy lol but I know what it's like to be mad at an ex.

there's a couple of ugly typos here and there but I can ignore them and still appreciate the creativity and the rythm in this poem. I love the lines with "cut cut cut you out of me" and the last stanza has an awesome rythm. I love how it all starts off slow and then picks up speed. Maybe i wouldve liked it if it were longer? But it's fine the way it is.

The second stanza was kind of bland compared to all the other ones... which seemed more flavorful with anger and witty lines and just better more fun-to-read writing. But if you're not a perfectionist, pat yourself on the back for a job very well done :)


BabyV GOLD said...
on Jun. 18 2010 at 6:46 pm
BabyV GOLD, Jachksoville, Florida
13 articles 0 photos 30 comments

Favorite Quote:
A really good poet write so that the reader can walk in their shoes just for that one minute. Victoria Jones

Its really different, which makes it good! It does suck to be dumped on valentines day.

on May. 14 2010 at 1:25 am
AlexandraVasari PLATINUM, Fort Stewart, Georgia
28 articles 4 photos 174 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Writing songs is super intimate. It's a bit like getting naked"~ Gwen Stefani

No problem!:) I enjoy reading your work!

on May. 13 2010 at 6:13 pm
Pitiful_Anonymous PLATINUM, New Cumberland, West Virginia
22 articles 0 photos 75 comments

Favorite Quote:
"and all you f***ers go beep beep beep in cheap,plastic cars. If It's to dumb to see or say you'll still sing it, and I'll just cue the applause" - Marilyn Manson

Thank you so much for the feedback :)

on May. 13 2010 at 5:42 pm
AlexandraVasari PLATINUM, Fort Stewart, Georgia
28 articles 4 photos 174 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Writing songs is super intimate. It's a bit like getting naked"~ Gwen Stefani

This is heartwrenching!!!I'm so sorry for you! You really have a unique way of writting and you express yourself well! I want to cry after reading this.....but it's still awesome in an incredibly sad way.


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