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Top Voted Limericks

Here are the top voted limericks:

voted
#1
Dynamite Ham
There once was a guy named Sam, Who never tried home-baked ham, So he took a bite, Tasted Dynamite, and all he uttered was "Damn!" (more »)
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#2
School Lunches, Music, Shirt
School lunches are not a good course we have trouble finding the source it might not be meat smells like sisters feet pretty sure it's made from a horse. Music is food for the soul like tostitos chips in a bowl I like rap and... (more »)
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#3
Two Limericks In A Sack
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Out by the broad, open sea A sailor had gone to flee The ship, it sailed The wind, it wailed And scared the daylights out of me He had sailed down yonder In the way of an absconder Northward, he rowed Southward, sea floats And thus he... (more »)
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#4
The Meaning of Love? This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine.
The beating of my broken heart, now chained and locked away, I hear much louder, through the night, than words we never say. As hollow kisses turn to dust and fall against my skin, I pray that I might find the strength to fall in love again.... (more »)
799 comments
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#5
Wordless Protest This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine.
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Who is Moore to measure poets but a half? What sorrowful flaw mixes poetry with math? If it doesn’t mix in with the classical norm, Nor embraces the free verse storm, Does it mean it has no place? Because it lacks a voice, Does it... (more »)
16 comments
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#6
Masquerade This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine.
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I moved through over a decade Of ceaseless, senseless masquerade So successful was my charade No friend ever saw through my façade I have contrived a mask That is derived from fear A curtain of obscurities Hiding all my insecurities... (more »)
19 comments
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#7
Idiosyncratic This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine.
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Thoughts are mistaken for many plots. When you think, others think not. Ideas are tarnished as you soliloquize. Eccentric as you know it, you realize; Cynical but sweet gestures relax your mind and interpreting language that does not rhyme.... (more »)
38 comments
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#8
Bad Influence Limerick
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There was a naughty grownup named Syd, But he always acted like a kid. See he went and quit his job To commit bank-jobs with Rob But that don't compare to what HE DID! (more »)
8 comments
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#9
Mt. Washington This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine.
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Good authors are like beautiful trees, pummeled by wind and brought to their knees, blistering cold shutting them down; gold, tattered leaves a humble crown. But some writers live life covered up, unhindered, unchanged, as they start to... (more »)
11 comments
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#10
God Poem This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine.
God is? Father mother teacher punisher big brother preacher? I will? Love serve worship adore revere Respect exalt attend obey learn fear We say God gives cause for everything We think God has purpose for the crying Kids die because God... (more »)
27 comments
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#11
Squirmy Limerick
I wanted to write down a limerick, But my rhyming was never too quick. I squirmed in my chair, I pulled out my hair. I'm too picky with limericks to pick. (more »)
1 comment
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#12
Water Limerick
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Clear, fresh and cool, In large quantities, it's cruel. With a refreshing taste, it leads thirst to waste, and fills up children's pools. (more »)
2 comments
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#13
My Best Friend
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I promised you a story, and it's a story that I'll tell. A sad, sorrow story, of my whole life gone to hell. I've been thinking of memories in the back of my mind, I've been dwelling on tears, but it's the smiles I find. For nights, I've lied... (more »)
104 comments
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#14
Fluffy Limerick
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There once was a puppy who was quite fluffy. He lived in a house that was rather stuffy. His waging tail could kill, Of him I’ve had my fill, His fur was ever so puffy. (more »)
4 comments
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#15
He Was Only Three This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine.
My brother was already three Yet he still could not say “potty” I would call and squeal his dear name But received not a glance from he My brother was already three When aware doctors came to see He was a boy with autism Thus his... (more »)
28 comments
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#16
I Don't Want To Grow Up
I wish I were Peter Pan, So I could fly away to Neverland. I could eat and eat and never gain; if I hurt myself, I'd go through no pain. I could soar the world and outer space. I could be part of a pirate chase. I'd tell stories to the... (more »)
14 comments
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