wittness

February 20, 2011
By jaselisa GOLD, Greensboro, Maryland
jaselisa GOLD, Greensboro, Maryland
14 articles 2 photos 16 comments

i am a witness an eye of debris no one can tell cause there's more than one to witness life is pleasing but not done a young grissal to witness the world a bone of wisdom from him up above iv witnessed my family my friends to a day/night that never ends a day to be in court to know what i saw to know i was there and state what i saw i may have stumbled and fall but it was there in the peck of an hair walking through the aisle of the building while everyone stares i have witnessed or was witnessed that year before my next witness is ever more but a witness for sure.


The author's comments:
everyone has witnessed something even if it is someone or something doing somethin uncool or maybe just not good but i am a witness to life and so is new born life and each gender each pupil of the eye has witnessed something

Similar Articles

JOIN THE DISCUSSION

This article has 4 comments.


jaselisa GOLD said...
on Mar. 26 2011 at 10:59 am
jaselisa GOLD, Greensboro, Maryland
14 articles 2 photos 16 comments
thank you both i will take your advice

ShadowSun said...
on Mar. 23 2011 at 8:29 pm
I actually agree, I personnaly think the piece is really good, but for it to be appreciated by others it needs thing like puncuation and a spelling check. It was hard to read to be honest. Out of that it was great.

jaselisa GOLD said...
on Mar. 23 2011 at 5:14 pm
jaselisa GOLD, Greensboro, Maryland
14 articles 2 photos 16 comments
ok everyone has their own way of writting and thats mine so please dont tell me i already figured it out keep you personal opinion to yourself i dont need stuck up peolpe like you telling me wat my work needs so dont comment no more

on Mar. 13 2011 at 6:08 pm
SmileMoment BRONZE, Mariposa, California
1 article 1 photo 29 comments

Favorite Quote:
"Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened". -Doctor Seuss

I believe what you are trying to convey is interesting but to be completely honest this piece is very hard to read for it is lacking any puncuation or capitols. I would suggest going through your piece and change some phrases, add punctuation, and so on. This piece needs major editing.


Parkland Book