Weeping Willows Sway | Teen Ink

Weeping Willows Sway

July 29, 2014
By Olivia-Atlet ELITE, Dardenne Prairie, Missouri
Olivia-Atlet ELITE, Dardenne Prairie, Missouri
324 articles 10 photos 1166 comments

Favorite Quote:
"To these the past hath its phantoms,
More real than solid earth;
And to these death does not mean decay,
But only another birth"
- Isabella Banks


Weeping willows sway
in time to the lazy song
of sweet summer time



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This article has 4 comments.


on Oct. 1 2014 at 10:51 pm
Olivia-Atlet ELITE, Dardenne Prairie, Missouri
324 articles 10 photos 1166 comments

Favorite Quote:
"To these the past hath its phantoms,
More real than solid earth;
And to these death does not mean decay,
But only another birth"
- Isabella Banks

Thanks! I actually did start giving them new titles, one of my newest ones is called "On the Streets," and I tried to make sure it wasn't too close to the poem ^_^ I appreciate your feedback, it helps me grow :)

on Sep. 27 2014 at 12:27 pm
bruisedmemories ELITE, Birdsboro, Pennsylvania
109 articles 10 photos 62 comments

Favorite Quote:
"When you're young, you can fly, but we trip on clouds 'cause we get too high" -The Band Perry (Song: Don't Let Me Be Lonely)
"Cause no matter what, you'll never be alone" -Lady Antebellum (Song: Compass)

I agree with @MalaikaJ. If you changed the title of your haikus, it may add more meaning and uniqeness to them. That's just my personal opinion. Other than that, all of them are amazing. I especially love this one! Voted 5/5!

on Sep. 15 2014 at 8:27 am
Olivia-Atlet ELITE, Dardenne Prairie, Missouri
324 articles 10 photos 1166 comments

Favorite Quote:
"To these the past hath its phantoms,
More real than solid earth;
And to these death does not mean decay,
But only another birth"
- Isabella Banks

Thanks! :) I'll follow your advice the next time I write one ^_^

MalaikaJ GOLD said...
on Sep. 13 2014 at 3:53 pm
MalaikaJ GOLD, Cloquet, Minnesota
19 articles 2 photos 127 comments

Favorite Quote:
I love writing. I love the swirl and swing of words as they tangle with human emotions. - James Michener

I like that many of your haikus describe simple things. One piece of advice, haikus are short and it's hard to get a lot of meaning across in them. You might want to write titles that add to the haiku rather than repeat the first line. Just a thought. I like them, though!


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