Does it Get Lonely?

February 10, 2014
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Does it get lonely
on your throne up in the sky?
Your summers are cold.

Can you feel the wind,
does the cold rain dim your light?
Can it reach that high?

Have you been in love?
Must be dark being that bright;
have you seen the Spring?

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SpidersAcrossStars This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jan. 22, 2015 at 8:17 pm
3/5 I really liked to concept but personally would work on the execution. My favorite line is "must be dark being that bright" . That was amazing. reminded me of an that Steinbeck mentions in EOE about great things be lonely things.
aligurrl replied...
Jan. 22, 2015 at 8:45 pm
Thanks for the feedback
Helena_Noel said...
Nov. 28, 2014 at 9:12 pm
There is a poetic lilt and romanticized overtone to the author's comments that absolutely sweeps away its reader with ponderings. Might have been published as a second poem, easily.
That being said, the work itself is decent. I like the new thought, of a cold sun alone in space watching from the distant sky. The line, "have you been in love?" is an interesting thought, but seems a bit out there, almost like it was introducing something else never expounded upon. Aside from th... (more »)
aligurrl replied...
Nov. 29, 2014 at 12:53 pm
Thanks so much for the feedback, I'm glad you liked it!
SilverLiner said...
Nov. 26, 2014 at 6:40 am
the author's comments is actually way longer than the  now to the poem; wow, it kinda has a subtle rythm. it's really good *thumbs up*
aligurrl replied...
Nov. 26, 2014 at 1:43 pm
Thanks SilverLiner! Yeah, I felt there was just so much to be said about it for the reader to fully imagine what I was imagining when I wrote the poem. Thanks again :)
ansem_unlimited said...
Nov. 25, 2014 at 4:55 pm
Hey this poem is very sad but very well written, most people try to create sadness by using things like suicide or death as a topic (not that there's anything wrong with that) but this is just genuine sadness without being super miserable.
aligurrl replied...
Nov. 25, 2014 at 9:10 pm
Thank you!
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