Magazine, website & books written by teens since 1989

I'll be there This work is considered exceptional by our editorial staff.

Custom User Avatar
More by this author
I'll be there watching you
As you puff up like smoke
I'll be there searching for you
When you lose yourself.



Join the Discussion


This article has 6 comments. Post your own!

411Ellie_ This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Mar. 13 at 12:46 pm:
Less is truly more! The gentle simplicity of this poem is striking. Great work!
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
dianepoonThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Jan. 21 at 10:58 am:
This is very touching and I love it, I love how simple it is
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
Gwenndy This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
Feb. 19, 2013 at 2:52 pm:
This is beautiful. It says a lot, but in only a few words. But haikus are 5, 7, 5. It consists of three lines. 5 syllables in the first line, 7 in the second, and 5 in the third. It takes practice and lots of counting. You'll get there soon. Good luck!
 
IlovemeThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
May 16, 2013 at 12:00 pm :
Thanks gwenndy! Yeah, I'll have to keep thud technicalities in mind next time! Appreciate your comment :)
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
KnitsandPurls said...
Feb. 16, 2013 at 10:28 am:
First of all congratulations on your Editor's Choice! That's awesome! Also, I love the simple repitittion. In only four lines, you seem to have said much more. That is the beauty of poetry, and you have mastered it. I have a piece of advice, but it is more technical than anything else. This poem does not follow the syllable sequence necessary for it to be a haiku, so I would have posted it in the free verse section. Overall, I enjoyed this. Excellant, strong work! P.S. I have a h... (more »)
 
IlovemeThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. replied...
Feb. 17, 2013 at 4:13 am :
Hey, thanks for the advice. I appreciate it very much. Actually I haven't done haiku specifically in school but I did try to know about it from the Internet. The seven syllable thing is very confusing. shall research more! :D thanks again
 
Reply to this comment Post a new comment
 
Site Feedback