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Drift Away

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The heat of your skin
Your red lips tremble softly
Your eyes drift away




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This article has 3 comments. Post your own!

iCheetoThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. This work has been published in the Teen Ink monthly print magazine. said...
May 11, 2012 at 12:02 pm:
I really like the whole poem :)  Nice job.
 
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torilutz8 said...
Apr. 30, 2012 at 8:52 am:
Doesn't flow as nicely or feel as complete as your other haikus, but it's still nice.
 
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IAmWhoIWantToBeThis teenager is a 'regular' and has contributed a lot of work, comments and/or forum posts, and has received many votes and high ratings over a long period of time. said...
Apr. 28, 2012 at 10:22 pm:
I think the first line didn't fit in this the two last lines. I'm like, "What's with the heat of his skin?" Anyway, I know it's not that easy to write a haiku. Anyway, keep writing. :)))
 
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