most of the time I’m happy. 

By happy I mean Im able to turn up the corners of my mouth and expose my front teeth to give them the facial expression of which I one-forth feel. 

Rest of the time I feel haunted. 

Haunted by each and every person, situation, and conversation that has shown me the side of life that I wish I hadn’t seen.

They all say I live in a bubble, they say I run from reality but do you blame me? 

As a child, I loved to converse. mom tells me I was always happy to see new faces and shook hands on my own with almost everyone who smiled at me but that was sure before I was left shaken by a few. 

Im not a “wussy” but Im still scared. Im scared of how humans are equipped with so many emotions. 

And a little side note for you here- don’t ever be hesitant to read the word “emotions” as “weapons” in any text you read. 

Who doesn’t like to start a little romance at first.

And who doesn’t become a broken piece of lego lying on the floor afterwards. Either with the sharp end upwards, ready, rather urging, to hurt whoever tries to step on them next. Or a broken piece that excepts its fate waits to fit somewhere, anywhere just to be a part of something, somehow again. 

conclusion- once you’re unpacked, you’re never that shiny beautiful lego block again. 

I don’t cry a lot anymore. Nor do I speak much. What's funny is they think this is badass while I fear they’d call me too reticent. 

Not just me but even Santa’s gifts are unpacked for a few years now. No wonder I confuse him.