Lost in regret

April 21, 2018
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I can taste
Your memories
Pushed back far enough
For you to almost forget
You know the ones
You memorized by heart
With every sip you took
To forget and deny yourself
The ones you want
People to believe you forgot
The ones you want
Yourself to believe you forgot
The footsteps you took long ago
Back when you knew
Where you were going
The footsteps that washed away
But implanted themselves
In the world
Like a concrete mold
Tempting you
Luring you
With every moment
True, its hard trying to forget
But it’d be a crime
To attempt to find
Where you left off
The memory reminds you
Of where you are
Screams at you
For stopping halfway
And forgetting where you were
Leaving yourself vulnerable
To any change in direction
Blood spills from the lip
You bight too often
This fact is not new to you
You know this isn’t
Where you should be
You see this fact
Pointed out to you
Every time you refuse help
Assuring yourself
You’ll pick yourself up
Maybe one of these times
You might even listen
To your lies
That you hear so much
They’ve rotted
But one of these times
You will listen
You will do something
You promise you will
Your notes you make
That have been waiting for you
For years
Claim that one day
You will listen
Just not today.

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