as the tears pour from my eyes
i realize how you hurt me without a thought of how it would affect us

or how long the scars would last

as i wipe away the tears
i realize how i never crossed your mind when you hurt me the way you did

and how my feelings were subsequent to your desires

you ask me for my forgiveness
you ask me to forget
you ask me to trust you
but i am not sure if i am capable of those things

because the way you hurt me hit like a train
i was incapable of
moving
speaking
breathing
thinking

i try to forget
i try to trust you
and most of all,
i try to forgive you

however,
these things…
they don’t come easy. 
they take time

and i am afraid it is time i do not have
to waste on someone who hurt me so terribly

i am afraid it is time i do not have
to forget the mistakes you made

i am afraid it is time i do not have
to learn to trust you again

but i am certain
that it is time i can learn to grow
and forgive

because everything always comes back to you
circles
crawls
creeps
itches
its way back to you…
so how could i forget you, when you are always on my mind?

and as you get on your knees
and cry for my forgiveness
please know that you damaged my heart
beyond compare
and perhaps…
beyond repair

but i believe in forgiveness like i believe in
the oceans, seas, and rivers that surround us
like the stars, planets, and galaxies we find ourselves getting lost in

so know that this is your second chance
a chance for you to prove that you are sorry
a chance for you to learn from your mistakes
…
not repeat them