The Woodpecker

January 18, 2018

Imagine having front row tickets to a Metallica concert;
people roaring, music blaring, I feel claustrophobic.
The agony is alive for hours upon hours,
only until the last note is played
and everyone gets ready for bed.
My life savings gone,
only memories remain.

But then, I hear screaming like an air horn is in my ear,
only to realize there is no axe murderer in my house, but my daughters.
I feel the same way I did at the concert;
daughters deafening, voices ringing, I feel annoyed.
I look forward to the day when I can finally get some sleep
with no nagging or harassing.
My life savings gone,
only daughters remain.

It’s 2:30 am, I hear banging though everyone is asleep, or so I thought.
Flashlight on, BB gun in hand, trembling uncontrollably.
I waltz up to the banging,
only to find a tiny woodpecker,
getting on my last nerve.
My life savings gone,
only a hole in my house remains.

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