Silence

January 9, 2018
By Anonymous

Monster
You keep me held captive
You take everything away from me
The people I love
The sport I love
The communication between people I never see
You make me go insane
You make me feel awful
You make me feel like I’m a monster
When it’s you who's the monster
Not me
But you
The nightmare when I sleep
The monster under my bed
And to think your name is dad
Because they are the ones who should protect
Not push away
Not make their child feel unwanted
But to feel loved
But that’s not you
You are the monster
That keeps me up at night
Afraid to even speak my mind
Since I’m afraid I will get yelled at
You are the monster
Worthless
You make me feel dumb
You make me feel like I won’t get anywhere in life
I feel as if there is no success in my future
You make me feel as if I am incapable of anything
One bad grade and there goes my life
No phone
No car
No license
No friends
No volleyball
Just because of one grade
You are the end of my life
Don’t expect me to love
Don’t expect me to feel emotion
I feel nothing
Because if I do I am in pain
I feel like life is falling apart inside
And I can’t do anything about it
I try my hardest
You just don’t want to understand
You want me to fail
You want me to be someone I just cannot be
You want me to be the person you never were
Well I am your daughter
I take after you
So don’t be disappointed if I grow up and end up being like you
But I will never be like you
Because I know my kids would hate me
And I just want love
No hate
And that is what you give me
Hate
The end of you
That b**** you call your fiance
She controls your life
Your more temperamental
Have a shorter fuse
You blow up at me for the smallest things
Yet you aren’t the bad guy
She makes you change even if you don’t want to
But anything to please the queen, right
Her kids are the perfect straight A students
You try to get me to be like them
Well reality check a**hole
I am not them
I will never be them
And I don’t ever want to be them
I am who I am
And I sure don’t give a damn
I may struggle but I get the help I need in order to succeed
I don’t fail just to have you yell at me
I fail because I don’t understand
I fail because I miss the one person who helped me out the most when I struggled
Now she is gone
And I have nobody
But a father who yells at me
And takes everything I love away from me
So thank you
For ruining our relationship forever
So now you are finally the bad guy



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