Because There Was a Kitten

A teenage boy often liked to go driving at nights
Out on the country roads.
The road he took to get there always split in two.
Usually, he took the right road,
But one night he saw a kitten lying there, 
So he went left.
He never knew that the left led to a cliff.
He drove off and plummeted to his death.
Why did he die?
Because there was a kitten.

The funeral happened the following week.
The boy’s uncle was flying in.
He was driving to his hotel after the flight;
He rented a car.
While he was driving on the freeway,
One of the tires blew out, and
Five cars had a collision;
Eight died in total.
Why did they have to die?
Because there was a kitten.

After the boy’s funeral,
The father was on his way back home.
He used to be a drinker,
And decided to bring back some old habits,
Drink away the loss of his son and his brother.
He took a detour to a bar.
He kept drinking and drinking
Until the bartender wouldn’t give him more.
He hit the bartender,
And a fight broke out.
Cops came; they were met with resistance.
Fifteen people were beaten to death or shot;
The father was one of them.
Why did they all die?
Because there was a kitten.