Bedtime Stories

October 8, 2017
By Anonymous

Christopher Robin
Winnie the pooh
Puff the magic dragon
One tin soldier too.
Bedtime stories I most enjoy
Characters as real as any toy.
All that I could ever dream of, and want to believe
But my bedtime stories were hard to receive
Inappropriate gestures
Behind locked doors
Stole my purity and innocence
A few years after I was four
Too young to know right from wrong
I didn't know how to respond
Frozen in silence
My voice taken away
I hated myself more everyday
And now i'm left with memories that haunt my life
I find myself holding a knife
Right then and there I want to end it all
But somehow I have to stand tall
I am a survivor
Mighty and strong
There is a place where I do belong
I will make it in this world
No matter what they say
Because I have already experienced hell, in every way
It will not be easy i'm aware
It leaves its mark with every standing hair
I have it too
But I calm myself down
With those fictional characters
I strongly hold on
Christopher Robin
Winnie the pooh
Puff the magic dragon
One tin soldier too.
They are what keep me here
And i'm ready to say or do
Everything or anything that you need me to
I will be the voice for those without
I will always listen and have no doubt
My book is still open
My story is not done
I now sit and think about christopher Robin's son
With the house on pooh corner
Where they chased the clouds
I know I will always stand tall and proud.

The author's comments:

This poem is about my sexual abuse history and what I went through. The bedtime stories I listed as examples relate back to a camp that I went to, that camp kept me going and gave me the strength to live. I experienced years of abuse from a close family member. For a while i was super depressed and suicidal but over the years I have grown from it and now I want to share with others that sexual abuse does happen and for those who have experienced it that they can be strong enough to grow from that experience, that they are strong enough to continue living. It is hard It took me years but it is also possible.

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