i try and fail

October 19, 2017
By hardwicke612 BRONZE, Madison, New Jersey
hardwicke612 BRONZE, Madison, New Jersey
4 articles 0 photos 0 comments

i try and fail
to contain these words
words not easily contained
they reach out
they strike her across the cheek
and i reach for them, i reach for her

i try and fail
to pull her up
off the floor
to separate my tangled words
from her hair
where they got stuck
and inched their way around her neck

i try and fail
to apologize
to explain what the mess all means
it’s not enough

i try and fail
to separate myself
from the source of the words
but she knows they are mine
and i do too
so she takes out her scissors
and cuts off her hair
leaving my words
with no place to tangle
and no place to call their own

i try and fail
to remedy what cannot be fixed
i dress her scars in gauze
and i wonder
why i didn’t do this sooner
if the monster inside regrets a thing
and if it died
whether anyone would dare come closer

The author's comments:

This poem is about how my autism has affected some of my previous friendships. 

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