I’ve spent hours wondering why when I scream when I cry you just laugh how can you just laugh
I try and get a reaction
Just to know you care
You didn’t know it but you just aggravate the hate I’ve been harboring for you
But anger is always born from pain
I was ruined by the realization that a father doesn’t love his daughter
That I can’t fix you
That provoking you won’t make you realize that you’re hurting me
When the laughter appears in your eyes the eyes that look just like mine but I’m crying I fear for the seed of you that lives in my DNA
I see it in me how sometimes I’m like you and I hate me for being like you I hate you for making me hate myself
I’ve always been told hate is a strong word
But I guess that’s good because I need to be strong to keep away from you to stop myself from trying to get validation from you because I know it’ll never come
I need to use strong words to remind myself of all the times I’ve cried over you and remember how many tears you’ve lost over me, none
I need to use strong words to keep myself from chasing a love you can’t give me
I need to be strong because when I read the words I write you think they’re meaningless and they’re not.
These are the things I wish when I said could make you see all the hurt you’ve caused me but they won’t.
You have forfeited the love of your daughter.