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The Girl Who Once Was

A young girl peered in the mirror
At her reflection one summer night.
It was several years ago
But in her mind, a recent sight.

Her skin was tinged a golden tan
And free of any scars.
The most vivid desire she could have had
Was reading Harry Potter under the stars.

There were two things she valued most in life
Her best friend and her books.
Together, they thought they could conquer the world
Love and imagination was all it took.

The seasons changed and so did she
Each value and moral a shedding autumn leaf.
She tried to grasp her hopes and dreams
But her old happy mindset now felt out of reach.

Society was shifting around her
And it swept her up in its tide.
The only thing that remained constant
Was her best friend by her side.

Every night was a party
But not the kind she used to like.
It didn’t consist of reading
Or the poems she used to write.

Her friends did lots of risky things
And eventually, she did them too.
Maybe because it brought back the feeling
That there was nothing she couldn’t do.

I promised I would never abuse myself
I’m sorry Mom and Dad.
I know the school system ingrained in me
That doing drugs is bad.

I’m sixteen years old with a hundred regrets
Please don’t be mad or sad.
I pray that if my choices were different
Life wouldn’t have happened the way it had.

The best night of my pointless teenage life
Was supposed to be at the lake.
I only wanted to have some fun
I begged you to stay out extra late.

The sunset recalls some painted clouds
Pale orange fused with baby pink.
The dim memory of this declining sky
Makes my heart begin to sink.

We passed around a cup of joyful pills
I told myself that everything would be fine.
The world around me was a blur
When I saw my best friend for the last time.

The fateful lake ripped at the docks.
Hand in hand, we stepped up to the edge.
Our racing minds entwined to the sky
“Watch this, it’ll be cool,” was the last thing she ever said.

She smiled through dilated eyes
As she dove into the shining blue.
My best friend never came back up.
Still, I waited to see what she would do.

The next morning draped a blanket of dread
As the night’s events reoccurred in my head.
I ran to the lake, my legs filled with lead.
I’ll remember for the rest of my life that my best friend is dead.






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